


Hele On

by McDannoMauLoa



Series: McDanno: A Complete History [1]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, Developing Relationship, First Kiss, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-12
Updated: 2011-09-12
Packaged: 2017-10-23 16:50:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/252584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McDannoMauLoa/pseuds/McDannoMauLoa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve is finally fed up with Danny's refusal to become enchanted with Hawai'i the way he has, so he takes Danny to Kaua'i to fall in love with these islands. They both find more Aloha during their journey than they had bargained for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pualani

**Author's Note:**

> The suggested tracks for each chapter are strongly suggested to enhance your reading experience. Mahalo!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Leaving on a Jet Plane - Justin

Steve McGarrett had always liked night flights. He’d always felt he thought more clearly in the sky, as though the altitude served as a high point for better mental reception. Somehow he thought more clearly at night—he knew radio waves had greater range at night without interference from solar radiation. If a man-made machine was more sensitive without interference from the sun, he thought, so too was man. He’d stepped outside of Five-0 headquarters into the fragrant O’ahu night and was regarding the night sky in silent perspective when his ruminations were broken by a flustered looking Danny Williams in reluctant pursuit. Perhaps flustered wasn’t the right word to describe Danno—he always looked flustered, although Steve knew he wasn’t. Highly strung perhaps, victim of a short fuse, but “flustered” suggested too much of a situational attitude. With Danno it was a state of being.

Steve regarded his partner. “No tie?”

Danny dropped the duffel he was carrying and jammed his hands into his pants pockets. “Just following orders, Commander.” he said with a defeated look.

“Since when do you follow orders?” Steve feigned disbelief.

“I-since when do I follow orders? When do _I_ follow orders? I’ll have you know…”

“I’d follow whatever orders I got if it meant spending a paid week on Kaua’i.” Kono shouted from the street. “ _E hele kakou_ , there’s _choke_ airport traffic tonight.”

“Come again?”

“You’ll learn it this week Danno.” Steve said picking up both duffels. “She means there’s a lot of traffic on the freeway tonight.”

“You can’t just say ‘a lot’?”

Steve smiled. He knew Danny wasn’t meaning to be argumentative; it was just the way he asked questions about things—his Jersey way. Make fun of it, make observations about it, and compare it to things more familiar, bullshit a little— in the end, whenever Danny pushed his buttons about something like Pidgin English, Steve knew he was really interested.

With the amount of ribbing he got from Danny about every little thing he did, he hoped it was because Danny was interested in him, too.

***

“Anything we can bring back from Kaua’i, Kono?” Steve asked as they slipped out of the car at Hawaiian Airlines Ticketing.

“Nothing there I can’t get here.”

“How about a Bubba Burger?”

“Aww shoots Boss why you have to mention that?”

Steve knew he had her. “Just had a feeling. Call me if you can’t find the itinerary I e-mailed you. We’ll be back at 10 on Friday night.”

“Got it. Make it a double. With onion rings.” She shot a glance at Danny. “Aloha.” She smiled. “And good luck.”

“What’s she mean ‘good luck’?” Danny inquired as they walked into the heavily air conditioned cement block terminal.

“I think she means ‘good luck with you’ Danno.” Steve grinned. “I’m not sure how well this idea is going to work.”

“I’m still not sure what this idea _is,_ McGarrett. Organized crime on O’ahu doesn’t just take a week’s vacation, so I don’t see how spending a week on Kaua’i is going to help us catch the bad guys any better.”

“Danny it’s no different than being a good beat cop in Jersey City. You talk to the people in the neighborhood—you know who you can trust and who you can’t. You know who makes trouble, who means trouble, and whose middle name is trouble. To protect and serve, you first have to _know_. You’ve kept this place at arms length since you’ve been here, and I’m seeing if a change of scenery won’t change your attitude.”

Hawai’i wasn’t the only thing Danny kept at arm’s length, Steve thought. He’d never been averse to the idea of finding a man attractive, and the Navy SEALS afforded plenty of opportunity for that although it hadn’t been the most opportune time or place to act on it. Sure there were plenty of court marshal worthy SEAL-on-SEAL shenanigans he’d witnessed perhaps even been a passive participant in over the years, but it was just boys being boys, he though. Natural. Men just do this kind of thing when they’re stuck in squads like this.

It was different with Danno. Steve had been fond of Danno long before he began to think about what he looked like stepping out of a hot shower. Until he’d met Danno, Steve was convinced life was lived in a vacuum. You met people had varying degrees of connections with them some sexual, some affectionate, some familiar, but nobody had ever consumed his thoughts like Danno did. In the service, it had been too easy to focus on the task at hand rather than think about headier things like what he was doing with his life, but he’d been home in Hawai’i long enough now to be surrounded by normal people living normal domestic lives, and it appealed to him more than he’d ever imagined.

“Don’t tell me you were trying to sneak through here without giving me a hug, Steven!”

Steve had been busy keying his confirmation code into the purple kiosk to retrieve his boarding pass when he whipped around at the sound of a familiar voice.

“Auntie K!” he exclaimed, embracing the petite middle-aged local woman in a Hawaiian Airlines uniform with a plumeria tucked into her salt and pepper waist-length hair.  “How long’s it been?”

“Too long.” She smiled. “I’m so glad to see you again. Going to Kaua’i tonight?”

“Yes.” He paused.

“Auntie K, this is my partner, Detective Danny Williams. Danny, Kalama Hoapili. She and my Mom were coworkers forever.”

“Twenty-seven years.” Auntie K’s smile saddened visibly. “Aloha Danny.” She said, with another warm embrace. Danny seemed surprised at the hug for a moment, but then melted into it. Steve warmed, seeing his partner embrace a longtime friend of his mother. _He’ll eventually see this is how we say hello in these islands_. Steve thought to himself.

“Well, Five-0 hotshots, you may have full immunity and means here in Hawai’i, but the skies are federal territory, and I’ve got some paperwork for you two to fill out to travel with those guns.” Auntie said, pushing them toward the ticket counter.

Steve half listened to Auntie K rattle on about which coworkers who knew his family were still around when his thoughts drifted to how long he had known her and all the other coworkers his mother had grown close with over the years. How many times he had visited Mom at work at the airport, and how the _ohana_ at the airline was thick and tight. Mom had never had trouble putting Steve and his sister by themselves on a flight to Lihue or Kahului to visit family. “You’re flying _with_ family.” She’d always say. “I trust these people with my life, but even more important, I trust them with you, my precious _keiki._ ” After she died, they remained as family, even sending care packages when he’d left for the service.

“Better go.” Auntie K said, regarding the clock above the ticket counter. It’s a light load tonight and they’ll button up and get outta here pretty quick. “Here’s a better boarding pass than those flimsy paper things you get out of the kiosk.” she said with a wink.

“Mahalos, Auntie.” Steve said, giving her another quick hug. “I’ll give you a call when I’m back in town.”

“I’d like to see you both again soon. Aloha Steve, Aloha, Danny.”

“She’s a doll.” Danny beamed as they walked away.

“I love her.” Steve grinned at Danny as he quickened his pace toward the security checkpoint. “She’s probably as close to Mom as you’ll ever meet.”

Steve glanced back at the ticket counter before turning the corner toward the TSA checkpoint. Auntie K was standing on the baggage scale having watched them walk away. Even from a distance, Steve could detect a wise smile on her face. She knew.

***

“This is not the seat I had before.” Danny remarked as they tromped down the jet way to the 717.

“Did you think Auntie would let us ride in the back if there was a seat open in First Class?” McGarrett chuckled.

“She’s some lady.” Danny shook his head. “Like your Mom, you say?”

“So am I.”

“You? I do not see there being much in the way of similarity between you, and that sweet lady who just upgraded us to First Class. You, my friend, are a world apart. I hardly think she goes around busting down doors and hanging perps off parking garage roofs.” Danny opined as he sank into the purple leather recliner in the first row.

“You should see her handle an oversold flight.” Steve deadpanned, looking out the window.

Steve looked steadily out the window, answering Danny’s gripes in monosyllables as he watched the aircraft push away from the gate, leaving the rest of Hawaiian’s 717 and 767 fleet bathed in the gold floodlights of the interisland terminal. Taxi was the usual nighttime swirl of blue lights, and within minutes the plane was soaring over Mamala Bay on a course West North West toward the Garden Isle of Kaua’i.

The moon shone full and bright as Danno dozed and Steve enjoyed a quick glass of POG on the short half hour flight to Lihue. Steve wished it was the right time of year to see whales, which come to the warmer waters of Hawai’i in the winter to calve, and return to the North Pacific to feed during the summer. He’d seen them before in groups of twos and threes, the telltale whitewash of breaking water as they breached giving them away, like tiny footprints in the vast ocean below. The moon illuminated the tops and sides of the big fluffy white clouds suspended over the Pacific below - a deep navy carpet sparkling in the moonlight, gently swelling across the channel between O’ahu and Kaua’i.

 “Look Danny, it’s beautiful. Like a painting.” Steve reached a hand around Danny’s bicep and squeezed, waking him from his light doze and pulling him toward the window to have a look. He felt Danny’s hand on his shoulder.

“I can’t see through you.”

Steve leaned down as Danno leaned over further to share his view. He felt his pulse race as he realized Danno was leaning completely into him, close enough that he could feel his breath on the back of his neck and his left ear.

“I gotta admit,” Danno said, resting his chin on the top of the hand steadied on Steve’s shoulder, “That is pretty perfect. “Is that Kaua’i up there?”

Steve knew it was which meant the flight would soon be over. So much for spooning.

The plane landed with a bump, and skirted a long row of general aviation hangars on the way to the tiny terminal, bathed in floodlights like the one they had just left.

“Ahh, I recognize that smell.” Steve said, after they disembarked up the jet way, through the air conditioned holding room and out into the open air concourse of Lihue Airport.

“It smells like water damage.” Danny remarked.

“Yeah, isn’t it wonderful?”

“You’ve brought me to the sticks Steven,” Danny began. “I didn’t realize this place could get any more backwater, but it has. There are no lights! No city! Can you even get a pizza on this island? Remind me again, _what_ we are doing here that we couldn’t do at home?”

“You just called O’ahu home, Danny.” Steve grinned and listened to Danny complain out through the tiny baggage claim and across the street to the rental car hut where a yawning rental agent handed them the keys to a blue Ford Mustang convertible. Steve knew what he was doing here, though he didn’t dare reveal the real reason for the trip. His theory about night flights had proven correct—the short flight had brought clarity of mind as he came to the realization that he had come to Kaua’i with a specific mission. He had come to Kaua’i to make Danny Williams fall in love with him.


	2. Po'ipu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Hele On to Kaua'i - Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole

The blue Mustang had cruised with the top down through the sleeping town of Lihue in the briefest of moments, past a row of low buildings and under the rusted conveyor belt of the now-abandoned sugar mill, and Danno was still bitching. Steve was half listening, glancing at his partner every now and then in amusement. By the time they reached the darkened Kilohana Plantation, Steve had had enough. He took one of his hands off the wheel and slowly lowered Danno’s gesticulating hands.

“Whoa there. You can’t discover Kaua’i if you’re too busy shouting at it. Drink this in, Danno.”

He paused for a brief moment, and in a calculated move, brushed his thumb over Danno’s knuckles before letting go. He knew Danno was getting ready to start again, but he was quickly shut down with a quick head jerk and a deflating look.

“Drink this in.” Steve repeated. “Look at the moon, the mountains, and those perfectly illuminated clouds. And this.”

The click of the turn signal was the only sound as Danno’s gaze was transfixed by the [tree tunnel](http://www.flickr.com/photos/mcsixth/4732376744/) looming to their left.

“Wow.” Danno said in awe. “Why—who does this? Just a tunnel of trees? Is this natural?”

“Well, like many things in Hawai’i, the tree tunnel has more than one story. Nobody really knows if their version is completely true, half true, or not at all true. What I do know is that these are eucalyptus trees, which is why they smell so good.”

“Steve the Science Guy.” Danny smiled; arching back to take in the towering arbors, their knotted interlocking fingers interspersed just often enough to illuminate the tunnel with moonbeams bright enough to read by. The Kaua’i countryside shone brighter as the clouds had moved on, leaving the moon to shine directly upon the now fallow fields that once nurtured a waving sea of sugar cane. The rolling hills that undulated into steep peaks flickered by like an old fashioned picture show as the car lumbered past the measured interval between each trunk. The fauna of the underbrush hummed a steady chorus of a warm tropical evening as Steve wondered after a few miles and the end of the tree tunnel if Danny had fallen asleep, but a furtive glance confirmed his eyes were still open if half-lidded.

Submission. A minor victory.

***

Po’ipu, literally translated, means “crashing waves” and with the moon as full as it was the waves could be heard even over the nighttime din of the underbrush as they approached the shore.

“You know you way around here pretty well eh?” Danny mused.

“Mom grew up around here. In that town we passed two miles back. Koloa.”

“Oh yes. The place that looked like something out of the _Grapes of Wrath._ ”

Steve ignored the bait and chuckled to himself. He had a special weapon in store that he wasn’t ready to reveal just yet.

There was nobody in sight as they pulled into the _porte cochere_ of the [Sheraton Kaua’i Resort.](http://www.starwoodhotels.com/sheraton/property/overview/index.html?propertyID=379&EM=VTY_SI_kauai_379_overview)

Danny was impressed. “Now this—this is nice. You’ve surprised me. What are we bunking with the pool boys? Sharing a maid’s closet with five of our new best friends?”

Steve bristled at the word _closet._ That was another complicated mess to tackle.

“Nah, just a garden view room. I’m not that rich.”

“What you—you paid for all of this?” Danny’s voice trailed off.

Steve, a step and a half in front of Danny, cringed, knowing he couldn’t see.

“Department budget.” He backpedaled. “The Department Budget is not that rich. The Governor doesn’t just give us blank checks.” He glanced back at Danny.

“This is nice. Definitely nice.” Danny said, giving the lobby a once-over.

“Aloha. Reservation’s under McGarrett.” Steve smiled at the pretty young girl behind the front desk. Even at 11 PM, undoubtedly near the end of her shift, she still seemed as “on” as she should have been for such a nice hotel, smiling broadly as she pecked away at her keyboard.

“I’m so sorry gentlemen, we’re booked pretty full this week and I’m afraid we’re all out of double bedded rooms. However, I can offer you an ocean front suite with a king in the master bedroom and a pull out couch in the sitting room at the same rate for the five nights.”

 _Well that’s a mixed bag_ , Steve thought. _A king bed, but we’ll be sleeping in separate rooms._

“Works for me if it works for you McGarrett.” Danny said. “I’m sure a pull-out sofa bed in this fine establishment would be an immense upgrade from the pull-out sofa bed I sleep on at home.”

The girl was quick to sell the arrangement. “and if the sofa bed doesn’t work for you, just call us and we’ll have a rollaway sent up instead. They’re a little bigger and they can be more comfortable. Just let us know.” she said, with a reassuring smile.

The walk to the room through the labyrinthine corridors seemed endless, even with the clearly marked directions they’d been given at the front desk, but to Steve’s relief the rooms were far from the elevators, at the end of a long corridor. Kaua’i was in general silent enough, but the whirring and dinging of elevators was not his idea of a getaway. He could tell Danno was tired. There hadn’t been much discourse on the way up to the room, and he knew Danno was looking forward to a bed, any bed, where he could get horizontal and sleep for a couple hours.

“Definitely an upgrade.” Danny observed as he walked into the room and flicked on the lights. The sitting room was comfortably but not outlandishly furnished in a nondescript, vaguely island style, but what immediately caught his attention was the four poster bed in the adjacent bedroom, upon he which he flopped face first, arms out as though he hoped to float onto the layers upon layers of crisp clean sheets.

“Five minutes, detective. I’ll be out of the shower in five minutes and I want my bed.” Steve said. _With you still in it._ He finished the thought to himself.

“Right on it Commander.” Danny mumbled into the sheets.

“Right on it is right where I want ya.” Steve mumbled under his breath as he shut the bathroom door.

Steve took 15 minutes in the shower, because, after all, it was a great shower. Nothing refreshed him like a good shower at night to wash the tedium of the day down the drain, although he wouldn’t really have classified this day, at least not the last few hours of it, as tedium. Just him and Danno traveling—two guys on the road, facing a journey ahead as unknown to either of them as the blindest corner on the most narrow road in the worst weather. Steve impatiently waited for the next moment to come, knowing it could bring an acquiescing, reciprocating Danno into his arms, drive a freaked out Danno completely away, or worse, maintain the tense status quo that Steve knew was untenable moving forward.

 _I’ve got to know._ He thought to himself.

Moments later he stepped back out into the bedroom with one of the hotel’s plush, oversized cotton towels wrapped around his waist when he noticed Danno hadn’t moved from his position on the bed at all. Well, almost. He’d kicked off his shoes.

Steve tiptoed toward his sleeping partner, turning off the sitting room lights as he went. He bent over and studied Danno for a full half minute, realizing he’d fallen into a deep sleep.

 _He’s not going anywhere._

Rather exhausted himself, and rather hungry but too invested in the opportunity to share a bed with Danno for the night to think about anything else, he inhaled, turned out the bedside lamp, and in a momentary flicker of modesty dropped his towel and deftly slipped underneath the sheets next to his sleeping friend.

 _God that feels good._ He though, not entirely knowing whether he was thinking more about the fresh linens or the fact that he’d slipped under Danno’s outstretched right arm, which was still sprawled across his side of the bed, now resting heavy upon his mid-thigh. Steve adjusted the pillow and thought that it wasn’t near enough, but if that was all he was going to get, it would have been enough just for that one night.

“Good night Danno. I love you.” He whispered, dropping his guard in the creeping drowsiness as he lay on his side, turned toward Danny, watching him sleep. It didn’t take long for Steve to join him.

 _I’ve got to know._


	3. Po’alua Kakahiaka

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Grow Old With You - Kawika Regidor

Steve knew he’d slept well—he woke up in the same position in which he’d drifted off. He knew Danno had slept well too. He was still in his shirt and pants, and socks even, which Steve winced at. He could never sleep in socks, and he didn’t know how anybody could. More noticeable (and this made Steve’s nether regions twitch and grow more tumescent than they already were at this early hour) was that Danno had managed to rearrange himself on the bed during the night so that his blond head was resting on the pillow next to Steve instead of laying where he’d fallen the previous evening.

He’d seen Danno asleep before, but never up close. Never to where he could study the face of his slumbering partner, wondering what was going on behind those eyelids, subtly fluttering with REM. Danny’s expression was peaceful, and Steve hoped his dreamland was a peaceful one. A twinge of guilt shadowed Steve’s face as he reflected on whether he contributed to his partner’s stress. Not just the stress that he knew Danno had overblown for purposes of intensifying his trademark shtick—what worried him was the stress he _didn’t_ bitch to him about.

Steve’s aim had always been singular. You had a mission, and you did it, or you died. If you did it, you got another mission, and you kept on accepting missions out of duty to your country. If you died you did it for the cause, and you did it singly. Steve couldn’t fathom how much the job could weigh on you if you had children, like Danny did. They’d spent their days examining the very worst of the human experience, and while Steve knew Danno was an experienced cop, he’d become well acquainted with a look Danno gave at certain crime scenes—a combination of worry, panic, and fear, and he knew Danno was thinking about Grace. As a parent you spend a great deal of your time worrying about all the terrible things that can happen to your children, but Danno didn’t even need a mediocre imagination to understand all the peril that lurked around every corner, even in the relative peace of Honolulu.

It was watching Danno pull that face at a crime scene one day that Steve realized he loved him.  He’d asked his mother once, when he was eleven, how he would know when he was in love.  Without hesitation she’d said, “When you feel their pain as your own.” Steve knew that day his mother was right.  As he watched Danno’s expression change he felt the worry, he felt the panic and he felt the fear.

He laid and watched Danno sleep for a full half hour while he debated with himself the best way to wake him, though he hated to do it. He knew better than to touch the hair. He rubbed a hand across Danno’s shoulders and down his right arm with just enough pressure to do the job.

“Danno. Wake up partner.”

Danny’s eyes shot open, closed again as he inhaled deeply, turned the other side of his face to the pillow and exhaled again.

“Sleepy.” He muttered. “Five more minutes.”

Steve grinned. “Five more minutes. But then I get the cold water.”

“Mmm.”

Steve wasn’t sure if that was acknowledgement or protest, but Danny’s body was going limp again.

Either it hadn’t occurred to Danny that he’d shared a four poster king bed with Steve for the whole night, or he didn’t mind, because he’d woken up, or half woken up, next to Steve as though he’d done it every morning for half his life. A comforting thought.

He gave Danny seven minutes. “Danno. Let’s get up.”

“I’m up.”

Danny jerked up and turned his head toward Steve, freeing a hand to prop it up. His eyes didn’t stay open for long before they shut for another few seconds, opening again intently at Steve as though he’d just realized he was in bed with him.

“I must have passed out hard.”

Steve nodded. “You did.”

“Sorry.”

Steve fumbled for an answer. This was rocky territory.

“No worries. Go shower. I’m hungry.” Steve didn’t really want Danny to get out of bed, but he might betray himself to Danny if the pillow talk drug out.

Danny gave Steve a once-over and grinned. “Are we going to go spearfish it ourselves? Or do we have to chase it down and gut it?”

“I was actually in the mood for a donut.”

“Mr. Protein Shake is in the mood for a donut?” Danny teased.

“The rules don’t apply on Kaua’i.” Steve smiled.

Danny clearly wasn’t in any hurry to get out of bed.

“Danno, I’m hungry.” Steve shoved at his shoulder.

“I’m comfortable!” Danny protested. “And I’d love a cup of coffee. Go make me some.”

Steve paused, unsure of what to say.

Danny pushed himself up on both elbows and his smile broadened. “You can’t get out of bed, can you?” He gave Steve an inquisitive look as he waited for an answer.

“Danno I—I _don’t have anything on._ ”

“I knew it!” Danny exclaimed, flopping out of bed, throwing a pillow in Steve’s face on the way up.

“What? It’s how I sleep.” Steve countered, turning red.

Danno smiled for a minute, his expression belied his search for something witty to say, and Steve was fully expecting a lecture on the virtues of modesty on work trip room sharing situations, but Danno seemed to concede, heading for the shower, smiling, without another word.

Steve waited until he heard the shower turn on before getting out of bed to fish through his bag for a pair of underpants and to open a window.

***

“Now _this_ is a donut.” Danny exclaimed in between bites of a chocolate frosted donut with rainbow colored sprinkles.

“So are those other two.” Steve said, pointing at the apple fritter and the maple bar lying in wait for the detective’s eager chops.

“And they’re both mine, so don’t get any ideas, McGarrett. You just enjoy your plain glazed old-fashioned there.”

McGarrett was two bites into his donut, and it was pretty good, but he wasn’t sure if it wasn’t just the novelty of junk food he liked.

“So what is it with cops and donuts?” he asked.

“Before you go too far down that road, my friend, I might point out that you are currently a cop, eating a donut.”

Steve smiled as he watched Danny finish the donut, lick his lips, brush the crumbs from his fingertips, and start on the apple fritter with barely a breath in between.

“But why are they so closely associated? You always hear about cops and donuts.”

“Well,” Danny started, in between bites. “Think about it. They’re sold in donut shops and convenience stores, both of which are on cop beats, they’re still good even if they’ve sat out half-eaten on a desk or a dashboard it something unforeseen should come up, and they’re great with coffee, which police stations always seem to have in abundance, and which the donut shops and convenience stores usually give us for free.”

McGarrett took another bite. “I never thought of it that way.”

 _Note to self McGarrett,_ he thought, _wanna see a damn irresistible set of happy Danno eyes, just get him talking about donuts._

The sun had risen above the horizon enough to illuminate the [Poipu Shopping Village](http://turtlecovesuites.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/IMG_3306sfw.jpg)’s open air breezeways as the birds chirped awake the day. There were very few early morning walkers and donut-seekers, leaving Steve and Danny mostly to themselves at the wooden picnic table next to the walk-up bakeshop near the main entrance.

The shopping center was a short walk from the Sheraton, and Steve had noticed a quieter, more observant Danno as they strolled at a much slower pace than was normal for either of them, despite Steve teasing his partner about his hunger pangs.

Steve finished his donut about the same time Danno polished off the maple bar.  Steve had expected Danno to sit and relax a bit, as he did after most marathon meals, and that was marathon, Steve thought, even for Danno, but he popped right up, curiously drawn to a display window a few stores down. Steve sauntered after him, hands in his pockets, lingering in thought on each step, alternately examining his shoes and his surroundings, curious as to what caught his eye. He came upon Danny staring intently into the window of [Na Hoku](http://www.nahoku.com/).

“Jewelry eh?” Steve mused, sidling up to Danny and looking down at him.

Danny’s eyes were locked on a slipper pendant. The wheels were turning.

“Do you think Grace is big enough for big girl jewelry?” Danny asked, without breaking his gaze into the display.

“Sure.”

“Not that I’m afraid she might lose it, you know, that’s not the point, but I just always thought, you know, some things you’ve got to save for little girls so they can be busy being little girls. Call me old-fashioned, you know, but little girls shouldn’t look like Lady Gaga.”

This was a more intimate conversation than he was used to having with Danno, and Steve relished it. Even better, he felt strangely honored that Danno was asking for his opinion – actually _asking_ for his _opinion –_ and about his daughter. This was no light thing. He was asking Steve something he could easily have asked Rachel instead.

Steve thought for a moment. “Up to now, you’ve given her things she appreciates as a child. You’ll eventually start giving her things she’ll appreciate now, and will still treasure when she’s grown.”

Danny looked up at Steve, surprised, with an open-mouthed smile of agreement spreading across his face.

“Absolutely right. How do you know kids so well McG?”

“Dunno.” Steve shrugged. “Guess with a dwindling family you think about having one.”

“You’ve got one.” Danny was suddenly serious.

“Thanks,” Steve started, trying hard to mask the vulnerability in his voice, searching for a new topic.

“You know Steven,” Danny said, turning to face him, “maybe _you’re_ not as alone as _you_ think.” Danny’s eyes sparkled.

Steve swallowed. Danny held his gaze for a moment, and then broke away.

“So—breakfast, check. What’s on the agenda for the rest of the morning?”

Steve launched into a description, happy to have been given the out for a new topic. He wasn’t sure we he was suddenly self-conscious about his poorly-laid plans to get Danno to fall for him, but his partner was certainly showing a new light in the new day, on a new island.

 _Maybe this won’t be so hard after all._


	4. Wailele

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride - Mark Keali'i Ho'omalu and Kamehameha Schools Children's Chorus

Steve was beginning to inwardly panic. He’d realized after stepping back into the hotel room with Danno that he’d brought him to Kaua’i to seduce him but hadn’t planned the rest of his cover past renting a car and a hotel and calling it “cultural immersion”. The culture he didn’t have a problem with—Kaua’i was his Mother’s island, and he knew it well enough to keep them entertained for the better part of a week. But he was Steve the Planner, and he was beside himself for having not thought his plan through.  He supposed that when you were in love you were meant to be spontaneous, but he hadn’t quite figured out how to get that love message across to Danno, and it scared him. It had scared him when Danno got close in front of the jewelry store, and it was scaring him that he might actually have to own up to his feelings and leave himself open to an unknown: Danno’s response.

“I’m gonna lay down, Danny. That sugar got to me.”

“Yeah I’m just gonna step outside and call Grace.” Danny wiggled his cell phone.

Steve nodded and covered his eyes with the crook of his elbow, trying to sort out what to do next.

His brain was getting the better of him. His relationship with Danno was by far the most important he’d had since he returned to Hawai’i, and he knew he had to reveal his feelings—it would only be fair, but he suddenly felt the immense pressure of what it would mean to do so. The past few months back in Hawai’i had forced him to consider his path in life and where he wanted it to lead. The months spent fighting crime for the Governor of the home he loved were pure bliss—he was no longer abstractly fighting a difficult to understand enemy in the nether regions of South Asia—he was fighting a difficult to understand enemy in his own turf, but he was also fighting to directly protect his family. Danno. And now Grace. He supposed if Danno was his family so was Grace.

 _It’s list time,_ Steve thought. _What do I have to lose by telling Danno I love him? I could lose him. I could lose my commission. Shit. Haven’t thought about that. Don’t Ask Don’t Tell isn’t officially dead yet, is it? Danno’s also a subordinate, isn’t he? Double shit._

Steve looked out the window. Danno was out on the balcony pacing and talking on the phone. Not really pacing, just walking. Back and forth from side to side. Steve could hear snippets of the conversation, but he wasn’t using his Grace voice, he was using his Rachel voice.

 _That’s another hurdle. What am I doing? This is FUBAR._

Steve let out a long, tentative sigh.

 _Ok quick. Pros. What do I get by doing this? A family. Danno. Grace. More kids? Yeah, I kinda do want more kids. I’ve never thought of that before. How do we even do that? Hurdle. No. Not a hurdle. Thinking positives here. Damn I want that. No more making excuses to spend time with him. No more worrying what he might think if I hug him too long. Couple things. We could do couple things. Go dancing. Share a bed. Sharing a bed’s good. Doing naked things. That was nice waking up together this morning. I could do that every morning. A partner. You should have a partner in life. Why am I hurting?_

Steve felt the ache spread from his sides to the middle of his chest as he began to breathe deeper. He hadn’t realized he’d been holding his breath, and he wondered if this was what heartache felt like. He knew if he wanted Danno so much it hurt, he’d have to draw some conclusions before they left Kaua’i or he might lose his nerve.

He heard Danno lower his voice on the balcony outside, and he began straining to listen.

“No.”

“I’ve been thinking about it. A lot, actually. Yes, I know what it _means_ Rachel, and I’m not concerned about that. Yes I know it would be complicated, as you’ve pointed out to me several times before, and I might add it has been very effective, so I don’t need to be reminded again, thank you.”

He stopped and massaged his sinus.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“I love you too.”

Steve felt hot. Why was he telling his ex-wife he loved her?

He hopped out of bed as Danno walked back inside the room.

“We gotta go. We’ve got an island to see.”

“Never get married Steven.” Danny heaved. “It’s worth it, but it’s not worth it, you know?”

“If I _could_ get married…” Steve started, and stopped, realizing he’d said too much.

“What do you mean if you _could_ get married?” Danny asked.

 _Triple shit._

“You know, who’d wanna marry me?” Steve hoped Danny would buy the ruse and drop it.

“I dunno buddy, you’re pretty tough to take.” Danny said, cupping his partner’s shoulder. “Pretty tough to take.”

Steve exhaled in relief.

“But I could see somebody wanting to marry you.” Danny added.

Steve looked down at Danny. There was conviction behind those blue eyes, which had suddenly steeled in determination.

 _Shit._

 _***_

Steve had driven without considering where exactly he was taking Danny. He’d headed west, vaguely considering [Waimea Canyon](http://xdoem.com/data_images/waimea-canyon.jpg) _,_ which turned out to be a hit. Danny had looked out the passenger side and demanded Steve pull over into the next scenic outlook so he could take in the view. Danny had never done that before, and Steve was pleased. One of the reasons he’d chosen Kaua’i was that he knew that anybody he wanted to love him couldn’t love him without loving Hawai’i, and Kaua’i was the best place in Hawai’i he knew for people to fall in love with it.

“Why does Hawaiian music sound like reggae?” Danny asked as they got back into the car.

“Well, a lot of the new stuff does, yeah.” Steve said. “But Hawai’i is sort of this melting pot. You know the ‘traditional’ Hawaiian elevator music you hear in the airports and hotels? A lot of that musical tradition comes from the Portugal. Portagees they say around here.”

He liked Danny asking questions. Questions were good. He was showing interest, and he wasn’t being judgmental, like Danny could be.

The day had developed into a gorgeous one. Although Kaua’i was notoriously rainy, today was sunny, and the clouds were small, but still large and puffy enough to provide periodic respite from the sun’s rays as it reached its zenith near the hottest part of the day.

Danny was still asking questions about music with long periods of silence as he was transfigured into a reflective mood as Steve maneuvered through the hairpin turns and steep grades of the road to the State Park at [Kokee](http://icons-ecast.wunderground.com/data/wximagenew/s/StormTrain/144-800.jpg).

Tiny raindrops began to fall, and Steve was careful to raise the convertible top before leaving the car.

“Fog?” Danny asked. “In the middle of the day?”

“Clouds.” Steve observed. “We’re very near one of the wettest spots on earth.”

He grabbed his knapsack out of the trunk and beckoned Danny toward the trailhead.

“Where’s this leading us?”

“We can’t get down into the valley from here, but there’s a nice three mile hike along the ridgeline. You can’t see it now but the Kalalau Valley is beneath us, and there’s usually a better view from the trail.

“And what’s special about this valley that we have to hike three miles to see it?”

“It’s pretty. And it’s believe at one point tens of thousands of native Hawaiians lived in this valley. It’s like the Garden of Eden. Come on it’ll be worth it.”

Steve needed to clear his head with a good sweat. He was still reeling from overhearing Danno tell Rachel he loved her. He immediately felt insignificant. How could he compete for Danno’s affections with the Mother of his child, with someone he’d spent years married to? If he still loved her, he knew his own relationship with Danno, whatever it was, would be relegated to a lower shelf. He suddenly felt guilty again.

 _It’s so much easier for him to love Rachel. I’d just be baggage._

It was something else he hadn’t considered. Face with the choice, why on earth would Danno choose him? Danno was the only person that he’d really loved since he left his family for Annapolis, and he couldn’t help himself, but he’d never considered there might be higher priority people in Danno’s life—he’d almost completely forgotten about Rachel until he’d overheard Danno earlier.

Danny’s barrage of questions about the plants and birds they were encountering along the trail took Steve’s mind of his worries as they hiked a gentle downgrade below the tree line of the ridge, skirting a narrow valley adjacent the long, deep Kalalau.

“Stop for a sec. I need a drink.” Danny said. He stood behind Steve and unzipped the rucksack, pulling out a bottle of water, still cold, and sweating from the ambient humidity. He zipped the rucksack back up and Steve continue down the trail, which turned left into a semi circle about ten feet across and sloped down into the small valley thick with vegetation and underbrush. He sensed Danno wasn’t behind him anymore and turned around to find him still on the other side of the semi circle, holding the water bottle in between gulps while he bent over, hands on his knees, taking a breather.

“You’re not tired already are ya Danno?” Steve quipped.

“Nah, just having a break and a think.” Danny admitted.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Steve shifted his weight to one foot and stepped back.

Danny paused, and looked up at Steve, still hunched over. “I’m uh, considering remarriage.”

Steve was halfway through his third step toward Danny when he realized there was no longer ground beneath his feet.

***

Steve heard trickling water and suddenly felt wet. And hot. And he ached all over like he hadn’t ached in a long time. But mostly he felt hot. He opened his eyes and saw Danno smiling down at him.

“There he is.” Danno said softly.

“Danno, why are you upside down?”

He felt Danno chuckle softly, and wondered why he could _feel_ it, and why Danno was upside down. And why Danno was standing in front of a white screen.

He closed his eyes again.

“Uh uh” Danny said. “You’re staying with me, now that I gotcha. Open ‘em up.”

Steve opened his eyes again. As he began to get his bearings he realized Danno was sitting cross legged on the ground, with Steve’s head and shoulders were in his lap.

 _That explains why he’s upside down. And the white screen behind him is the sky._

”What happened?”

“Your dumb ass took a tumble.” Danny said. “And you scared the living shit out of me McGarrett. You promise me you’ll never do that again.”

Serious Danno again.

Steve didn’t remember the fall, but he remembered Danno telling him he was considering remarriage. Which meant this kind of intimacy between them was bound for that shelf Steve worried about.

“Hey hey, babe,” Danno’s soft voice came back. “There’s no crying in baseball!”

Steve didn’t realize his eyes had watered and run over.

“My head hurts.” He lied.

 _But not as bad as my heart._

“Can you move?” Danny asked.

Steve didn’t want to move. He wanted to lay there in Danno’s lap until he stopped hurting. But he had no idea how long it would be until he stopped hurting. In spite of how close Danno was holding him, he’d never felt farther away.


	5. Hikiwale Hewa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Haven't Met You Yet - Michael Buble

Steve tore into the plate of shrimp as if he hadn’t eaten in days. At least it felt like he hadn’t eaten in days, even though it had really only been about eight hours. He was accustomed to more protein at the beginning of the day, and hadn’t thought about how unsatisfying that donut would turn out to be in an hour or two. He was reminded why he didn’t eat junk food.

“Not hungry Danno?” Steve asked. Danno was picking at his own plate of shrimp.

“Still jittery.” Danny admitted. “Need I remind you again that you _scared the shit out of me back there?_ ”

Steve sighed. “I wasn’t thinking, Danny.” He dove back into his plate of shrimp.

Steve wondered why Danno was shouting, but Danno was always shouting, and it was difficult to hear as the passing downpour pounded against the tin awning they were sitting under. Wobbly plastic deck chairs, a picnic table that leaned, and lots of smiles and jokes from the staff—this place was a truly local establishment. He wanted Danno to see that but Danno was too busy yelling at him. He wanted soft Danno back.

After realizing he could walk and that the only thing really wrong with him was a couple cuts and a bruised heart, his mood for hiking had waned, and he and Danno had hiked back out of the valley to where they parked—where an ambulance was waiting. Danno had fished the sat-phone Steve didn’t tell him about out of his rucksack while he was knocked out and called for help, even though Steve had insisted he was fine. The paramedics mostly agreed, but told Steve he likely had a mild concussion and shouldn’t seep until that evening.

“You don’t have to yell.” Steve added after a moment.

“I’m sorry.” Danny said, frustrated. “I just… I wasn’t ready for that.”

“I wasn’t ready for…” Steve stopped.

 _Shit._

Danny looked perplexed for a moment, and then a light of recognition waved over his face and he leaned back in his chair.

“You don’t like the idea of me marrying Rachel.” He said.

Steve paused.  “Are you gonna eat that or just look at it?”

“No, take it. You don’t like the idea of me marrying Rachel again do you?” He pressed.

Steve took Danny’s plate of Cajun shrimp, made a face when he saw he’d put pepper all over it, and continued eating.

“Don’t ignore me McGar-“

“No Danny, I don’t.” Steve exploded.  “I don’t like the idea of you remarrying Rachel, ok? I wasn’t going to say it, but apparently you’re dead set on having my opinion, I don’t know why, because my opinion never matters to you anyway.” Steve felt hot again as he stared down at his partner’s half eaten plate, which he’d stopped eating from.

“So I guess you giving me away at the wedding is out of the question.” Danny deadpanned.

This wasn’t happening. Danno really was thinking about getting married to Rachel again. Who could blame him? The flickering hope that Steve had felt for months, the hope that Danno might feel the same way about him the he felt for Danno was becoming dimmer and dimmer with each sentence. He didn’t want to hear any more. He crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, examining his hiking boots.

“Hey buddy, that was a joke.” Danno softened. “Why are you so-“

“Because I love you, Danno. I’m sorry. I love you. That’s all I got. You can do whatever you want with that, but that’s where I am right now. I can’t give away the man I love to somebody else.”

Danny looked like he’d won the lottery. “I was wondering how long that would take.”

“What?”

Danny was laughing. “You should see the look on your face right now Steve. It’s priceless. Yeah, I knew, I’ve known for months. So has Kono. So has Chin. Jenna pulled me aside and asked me the day we met.”

Steve was numb.

“And,” Danny added.”I heard you last night when you thought I was asleep.”

It took Steve a split second to realize the ground beneath him was actually there this time, because he felt like he’d fallen again.

“You knew.” The heat Steve felt was beginning to boil over.

“Yeah.” Danny smiled, clearly amused with himself. “Hey wait, come back McGarrett!  You don’t understand. Steve! Let’s talk!”

Steve had to get away. He felt awful, and he didn’t want Danny to see him cry. He knocked over the wobbly chair and had darted behind the adjacent building before Danny had a chance to stop him. His head was pounding, and he was drenched in a few seconds from the downpour. He’d forgotten it was raining. He didn’t care. If Danny followed him, at least he wouldn’t see his tears.  He was angry that he was crying again, twice in the same day. The first time, he’d had Danno’s comfort; now he didn’t want it. He felt like such a fool—everyone was in on the joke except him.

He was crossing Laau Road when he heard Danno’s footfalls behind him in double-time. “Steve, wait up!”

He had no intention of waiting. No intention of hearing Danno kid him about how funny it had all been, how amusing he’d been to everybody.

Steve had cleared the trees and was now staggering onto the wet sand of the beach.

“You’re running out of places to go, babe, unless you’re planning to swim to Niihau.” Danny called.

Steve turned around and gave Danny a look that said _dare me to do it and I will._

“Will you just _listen to me McGarrett?”_ Danny was out of breath.

“I’m listening.”

Danny fumbled, at a loss for words. “I don’t—I don’t know I don’t love you too.”

“You don’t know you don’t love me?” Steve repeated. “You’re not making sense detective.”

Danny had finally reached him and was standing directly in front of Steve. The rain continued to pour down onto the beach and the surf continued to force their voices a click louder than normal.

“You don’t know if you love me. That’s what you’re saying.”  Steve frowned.

Danny stepped closer. “I don’t know that I love you the way I think you want me to Steve,”

Steve turned to keep walking, but Danny put his hands on his shoulders to stop him.

“I’m not done.” He said, looking Steve directly in the eye. “I don’t know that I love you, _that way_. But I don’t know that I _don’t_ love you.”

He put his hands on Steve’s waist, stood up on his tiptoes, and kissed him.

Steve felt everything behind the kiss. It was sincere, it was heartfelt, it was genuine, but best of all—it was Danno. Danno was kissing him, and it was wonderful. Steve thought if he couldn’t have anything else, at least he had this.

“But I promise you—I will find out.”


	6. Eia Au, Eia 'Oe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: I'm Yours / Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Straight No Chaser

Steve loved plumeria. The fragrant white yellow-throated flowers had always been his favorite, and they invariably reminded him of his mother. His earliest memories as a child had been picking up the windfalls from underneath the plumeria trees in their yard on O’ahu. One of his favorite photographs he’d kept over the years was of himself as a toddler, in hand with his mother, and a plastic child’s pail overflowing with their floral treasures.

He was surprised that Danny had come along with him as the sun hung low over the horizon when he ventured down Po’ipu Beach to pick plumeria from an obliging tree—surprised because Danny didn’t care much about flowers to begin with, and surprised that Danny had been as attentive as he had been since his shrimp shack confession. He was still confused by what he meant.

They’d had little conversation in the car on the way back to the hotel, but he’d made it clear that if Danny decided he _did_ love him, that he would have to make the moves himself. Steve felt he’d already done his part—he felt brutalized by Danny’s admission that he’d known all along, and he was sick of chasing the man for his amusement. He remembered using the phrase “sweep me off my feet”, and he flushed with embarrassment. He’d never considered himself a romantic, much less a submissive romantic, but he found himself longing to be feted and chased.

Steve plucked a plumeria from a tree he’d spotted in front of [Brenneckes](http://www.brenneckes.com/) and slipped it behind his ear. He reached for another flower.

“What about me?” Danny asked.

“You want a flower?” Steve asked incredulously.

Danny smiled. “I’m trying new things this week.” He winked.

Steve realized he must have looked pained because Danno’s smile crumpled into a concerned frown as he pulled him into an embrace.

“Hey buddy. I know it’s rough, and I feel bad. I just want to be sure, you know?”

Steve had no response for Danny. He also noticed Danny was in no hurry to break away.

After some time, they parted, and Steve plucked another plumeria off the tree for Danny, which he dutifully tucked behind his ear, which made Steve laugh.

“They do smell good.” Danny mused.

He took Steve’s hand as they walked back to the hotel.

“This is just new to me.” He explained.

“And I’ve had a lot of boyfriends.” Steve shot back.

“Well, have you?” Danny asked.

“No. Not one. I’ve never even been with another guy.” Steve admitted. “I thought about it, I knew it went on in the Navy, but I guess I had other priorities.”

Steve tried to think of what those priorities were, and he was having a difficult time remembering them. He’d been on autopilot for so long he’d forgotten what exactly where he was headed, or why, but back to Hawai’i had seemed like the right place almost as soon as he’d returned. He smiled as he watched a local family setting up for a cookout under a pavilion in the nearby beach park. A married couple, a bit older than he, and at least seven children, although Steve knew that as tightly knit as a lot of local families were, some of the children were likely friends or cousins. Steve was comforted by the domestic scene, and realized he’d always felt comforted by scenes of home and family, although he’d never considered having one of his own—not until he realized he loved Danny, and that all seemed to hang precariously in a balance that Steve couldn’t determine. He squeezed Danny’s hand, almost for reassurance that he was still holding it, and got a return squeeze.

He hadn’t thought there was anything out of the ordinary about walking on a crowded beach at sunset holding hands with his partner until he realized one of the older girls in the family was staring at them. The mother noticed and asked, Steve surmised what she was looking at. They chatted for a moment and the mother looked up, her eyes squinting as it was some distance. After examining them for a moment the woman smiled at them and turned back to the girl. Steve knew the mother was doing some explaining. That hadn’t occurred to Steve either, at least not in depth. If he managed to be the one Danny chose they’d have a lot of explaining to do. 

“What are you looking at?” Danny asked.

Steve looked at Danny and shrugged. Danny returned the smile.

They walked for a moment, and then Steve got curious.

“You’re being awfully understanding, Danno.”

Danny smiled. “Steven, to be quite honest with you, if a guy had told me he loved me and wanted to be with me a year ago I probably would have decked him, but I’ve never felt the way about a guy the way I do about you. It’s like…”

“You like me like you like Rachel.” Steve finished.

“Yeah! Yeah, I do.” Danny realized and spoke in the same breath. “How’d you know?”

“She told me while we were staking out at her house that she’d never seen anybody else press your buttons the same way I do. Is she, uh, in on this whole ‘Steve loves Danny’ I’m just know finding out about?”

Danny cupped the back of his neck with his free hand, visibly embarrassed. “I said I was sorry.” He squeezed Steve’s hand and looked up at him with sincerity. “And yes, she knows.”

Steve stiffened.

“I had to talk to somebody.” Danny protested. “What was I gonna do, discuss it at work? Ask Gracie on the way home from school? Spill my guts to Kamakona over shave ice and be elected grand marshal of the next gay pride parade within 48 hours after the whole island found out?”

“Are you still planning to marry her again?” Steve asked.

They’d reached the hotel bar near the beach entrance and Danny stopped to face Steve, cupping his hands around the back of his partner’s neck.

“Look, I know you want to be reassured right now, and it hurts me that you’re stuck in this limbo. Honestly, it kills me to see you hurt, because your hurt is my hurt.” Danny readjusted the plumeria behind Steve’s ear.

 _Got him!_

“But the truth is, I don’t know till I know. I really enjoyed this walk we just had, and to be quite honest, I’m pretty sure I would enjoy doing naughty things with you, but I’ve got to sort some things out in my head, ok?”

“Ok.” Steve managed.

“I just… I just don’t want to lead you on if I can’t keep my promise.”

Steve took a quick look around, and marveled that the other guests in the bar, at the pool, and along the beach didn’t seem to think anything was out of the ordinary, although he was in an untypically intimate embrace with Danny.

“Hey, you wanna dance?” Danny asked. “I like this song.”

Steve listened for a moment. It was Jason Mraz’ “I’m Yours”.

“You said you didn’t want to lead me on?” He joked.

“Trying new things this week. Just shut up and dance, McGarrett”. Danny smiled. “I’m leading.” He said, slipping his right hand to the small of Steve’s back.

“I’ve never not lead before.” He put his free hand on Danno’s shoulder. “Here?”

Danny nodded. “Feels about right. Though I’m not used to dancing with someone taller than me.”

“Coulda fooled me.” Steve laughed.

“Oooh, you’re gonna pay for that one later.”

Steve felt intoxicated. Danny was certainly making good on his promises to both find out what he wanted, and to take it when he decided he did want it. Steve liked being taken, and he had high hopes for the rest of the week.

“Who knew you could dance?” Steve mused.

“I will have you know all the Williams men can dance.” Danny defended. “Ma insisted. She said you couldn’t get married and never dance with your wife.”

“I suppose.” Steve felt hot again.

Danny seemed to realize the word “wife” might have been a slug for Steve, and he quickly moved on.

“So, uh, what’s for dinner tonight?”

 _Ah yes, the secret weapon._

“It’s a secret.” Steve teased.

“C’mon I gotta know what to prepare for!”

Steve shook his head. “You’ll like it, I promise.”

“Is it far? I’m starving.”

“Shouldn’t have given away that plate of shrimp.”

Danny shrugged. The song was over and he was ready to go. As they walked away Steve realized Danny’s arm was still around his waist.

“I’ve actually got my wallet this time.”

“The one time you don’t need it.” Danny chortled.

Steve looked down at him in surprise, about to protest Danny wanting to pay—it was coming out of the budget after all, but Danny stopped him.

“Uh uh. You’re my date tonight. If I’m going to find out, I’m going to find out the right way.”

Steve fairly floated to the car.

***

Danny didn’t let go of Steve’s hand in the car, he didn’t let go of it as they reached [Old Koloa Town](http://www.oldkoloa.com/), and he was still holding it when they walked through the front door of [Pizzetta](http://www.pizzettarestaurant.com/)and he could almost feel Danny’s knees buckle.

“You _can_ get pizza on this island.” He said softly.

“I used to love coming here when it was one of those grill-it-yourself places. That was twenty years ago now.” Steve reminisced. Time seemed to stand still on Kaua’i. He swore even the furniture and fittings were all the same, sold with the place when the Pizzetta had first opened.

“Two chiantis please sweetheart. Mahalo.” Danny ordered as he began to dissect the menu. Steve hadn’t even looked at his.

“Is one of those for me?”

“Yes. I’d say we both need it, after the day we’ve had.”

Steve shrugged again. “I’m pretty relaxed.”

Danny put his menu down, and studied his partner, as though he didn’t believe him. “Good.” He nodded. “This is good. I’m surprised you’re not checking in every twenty minutes with Chin and Kono.”

“That reminds me.” Steve reached for his phone.

“Oh no you don’t, Steven J. McGarrett, not on a date with me you don’t. There are two perfectly capable cops handling things back on O’ahu. You’re all mine tonight, you got that?”

Steve blushed as his glass of wine was set down in front of him.

The server didn’t even have time to get a word in.

“A large pepperoni pie, extra cheese please. And he wants a salad. House dressing. On the side.”

Steve got hard under the table. Danny was ordering for him too—as though it were second nature to him. “I get half that pizza, right?”

Danny cracked a wry smile. “Babe, if it’s anything like what I smelled walking in here, you’ll be lucky to get half a slice.”

Steve took a sip of his wine. He’d always found Chianti a bit dry for his taste, but he found it very drinkable. He realized Danny was watching him, and involuntary flashed a shy smile between sips.

Danny shrugged. “Just lookin’ atcha babe.”

“And what are you thinking?”

“You want the real truth there?” Danny sipped his wine.

Steve nodded.

“It scares me how much I like you.” Danny confessed.

“Scares you, why?” Steve didn’t like where this was headed.

“I was thinking, you know. You go to a bar mitzvah once and it doesn’t make you Jewish. But you fall in love with a guy—well, it doesn’t make you gay, but you may as well be. You suck one cock and you’re a cocksucker for the rest of your life.” Danny frowned.

Steve wasn’t sure what to say.

Danny continued. “There used to be this guy who was a friend of my Ma, back in Jersey—Artie. He lived up the street with his partner Mark and everybody knew what they were, and everybody laughed at them, but not Ma, and not Pop. Ma always told us kids, ‘If I ever hear you saying bad things to or about people because of who they are, I’ll knock you into the middle of next week—I don’t care if it’s race, religion, or having freckles and curly hair—but you if ever, _ever_ , say one wrong word about Artie or anybody else like him because of who they love, you won’t sit down for a month.’ You see, Ma knew Artie since high school and she always felt bad – ‘such a lonely life’ what she said all the time.”

Danny finished his wine and raised his glass, indicating he’d like another.

“I don’t know why I told you that.” Danny sighed.

“You’re afraid of what admitting you love me makes you, and you’re afraid it makes you like him.” Steve said.

“Yeah, I mean, Artie was actually a pretty great guy, but he—hey what do you mean _admitting_ I love you?” Danny had a twinkle in his eye. “I see what ya did there McGarrett. Trying to get me to _admit_ I love you like you’re saying you already know I do.”

“You do?” Steve brightened.

Danny blushed. “There, you got me again! Backed into the corner by the crafty Navy man.” He shook his head. He took a big sip of wine and Steve expected him to bitch at him for being pushy, but he just smiled and leaned back in his chair as Steve’s salad appeared on the table in front of him.

“So whatever happened to Artie?” Steve asked as he ground some pepper onto his salad.

“His partner was dying of AIDS in the late ‘80s and his family wouldn’t let Artie see him. They talked on the phone every day until Mark wasn’t able to anymore. His family even buried Mark on their property, so Artie said goodbye to him on the phone, and couldn’t even go to the funeral or see his grave. Pretty fucked up.”

“I’ll say it is.”

“He died of a broken heart, Mom told me. While I was at college.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” Steve offered.

“Not if I have anything to do with it.” Danny confirmed, squeezing his thigh under the table. “Now that is an amazing looking pizza pie!” he said excitedly as the pizza was placed on a stainless steel wire stand above the table.

Steve watched with hope as Danny took his first bite, and the look on his face told Steve he was sold. Finally, Danno had found good pizza in Hawai’i, and on his mother’s island. His mother’s and his.

***

After dinner they’d gone for another long walk, hand in hand, up and down the creaky wooden boards of the Old Koloa Town storefronts, seeking nothing in particular, enjoying the still warmth of the still young evening, taking in the sounds of Koloa, finding refuge in an art gallery during the briefest of downpours. Danny was quieter, more reflective than usual, and Steve had caught him staring at him a few times from across the art gallery they’d ducked into, like he was undressing him with his eyes, still searching for the answer to whether he loved him the way Steve wanted to be loved.

Back at the hotel, Steve was out on the lanai, watching the surf crash along the beach when Danny joined him.

“I’m running a bath.” He said, matter-of-factly.

Steve nodded.

They sat in silence, both in silent reverie, hypnotized by the waves reflecting white with the lights the rows of hotel rooms shone on the sand below.

Steve snapped back to reality first. “Your bath is going to run over.”

Danno smiled and grunted reluctantly as he rose from his chair. “It’s for you.”

“You ran me a bath?”

“Yeah. Thought it would do those sore muscles and bruises some good.”

And it did. Steve lazed in the tub for nearly an hour, dozing off more than once.

When he dried off and emerged from the bathroom with a towel around his waist, thoroughly refreshed, he came upon Danny in his bed, snoring softly. He’d taken the side nearest the window—the same side he’d slept on fully clothed, over the covers, the night before. But this time, Steve noted, he was _in_ bed, under the covers, and he’d taken off his shirt.

 _And what else?_

Steve wasted no time slipping into bed next to Danny to find out. As he pulled the covers over him Danny woke up, rolled over, and smiled at his partner. “I didn’t want to pull out the sofa bed.” He explained.

“A likely story.” Steve smiled.

“Hey, I’m trying new things this week.” Danny’s smile broadened.


	7. Nou No Ka `I`ini

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested Track: Nothing Can Change This Love - Ekolu

Danny looked so damn gorgeous, lying there against the snow-white sheets; his blue eyes sparkling in a way it seemed only sparkled at Steve. Steve noticed the white plumeria was still balanced precariously behind Danny’s right ear, which he reached out to adjust. No sooner had Steve slipped his thumb and forefinger over the flower when Danny reached out with his free hand and lightly held Steve’s forearm in place. Steve’s heart was pounding as he spread his fingers through Danny’s hair, the hair nobody was allowed to touch lest they muss it, but Danny closed his eyes and smiled a smile of contentment as Steve spread the pads of his fingertips out like a starfish over Danny’s scalp, through his thick sunflower mane.

Danny tilted his head back and in an instant came back to Steve, opening his eyes and piercing Steve’s own gaze,  nodding his head and catching Steve’s wrist with a soft, puckered kiss, quick and light before parting his lips and following the first tentative peck with a more commanding smooch. Steve tingled as he felt the wetness of Danny’s mouth on the sensitive skin and shivered as Danny slid his hand, thumb on the inside of his arm, four fingers outside, all the way to Steve’s armpit as he continued kissing his wrist.

Steve was rock hard as Danny stifled a giggle, as though kissing his partners wrist were suddenly absurd. Danny broke away and glanced at Steve again, suddenly deciding what he wanted was before his eyes and his features were upon Steve’s between blinks.

“What do you want?” he whispered.

“To give you whatever you want.” Steve smiled.

Danny kissed him. Shy and reserved at first, like a teenager’s first awkward peck, before opening his mouth and annexing more of the territory Steve had declared was his to exploit.

Steve realized he was still propped up on one elbow, which he let go, falling back onto the stacked pillows, away from the kiss. Danny had a goofy grin on his face.

“Never thought I’d be naked, kissing my partner in bed.” He half giggled.

“You’re naked?” Steve’s erection jumped.

Danny nodded.

“Bullshit.” Steve reached a hand toward Danny under the covers. He was naked alright. And rock hard. And _huge._

“Damn, detective.” Steve smiled. “Didn’t know you packed a shotgun.”

“Lotta garbage out there, Commander.” Danny joked. “Ya gotta keep some heavy guns in reserve. That feels good.”

Steve realized he was absentmindedly playing with Danny’s dick.

“I’ve held one before.” Steve deadpanned.

“You better be talking about your own.” Danny teased.

“Jealous, are we, Danny?” Steve smiled.

Danny kissed him again.

 _That works for an answer,_ Steve thought.

Danny’s dick was getting noticeably wetter as he climbed on top of Steve. They kissed lazily as Steve’s hands explored the man perched atop his torso. In spite of his fondness for junk food, Danny was _solid._ Steve reveled in his body, realizing it was the first time he’d held another man, another naked man, up so close. He marveled at the taught muscles flanking the side of Danny’s chest, beginning at the downy patch of hair in his armpits, tapering and thinning into his ribcage, which heaved as Danny gasped in air between kisses. Steve continued his journey, cupping his hands around the sides of Danny’s waist and feeling up over his lower back, past the twin dimples just above his ass, which was alabaster white with a patch of wiry fuzz on the very bottom.

Danny had stopped kissing him and rested his chin on Steve’s chest for a breather, but he didn’t take his eyes away from Steve’s.

“Taking your time.” Steve observed.

“Do you have to be somewhere?” Danny asked.

Steve shook his head. “Right here.”

“Good.” Danny gave a funny expression. “This needs something.”

“What?”

“This.” Danny ground his dick into Steve’s. “I mean, this is wonderful, but, it could be easier.”

He hopped up and headed into the bathroom, emerging after a few seconds with the hotel sample sized bottle of hand lotion. Steve giggled as Danny walked back toward the bed, his erection bouncing.

“What’s so funny?” Danny asked as he settled back in place on top of Steve.

“It’s not every day I see a man walking around with a big bouncing boner.” Steve smiled.

“Don’t tell me you never do that.”

“No, actually I don’t go on long cross-country walks sporting wood.”

“And you can’t tell me dick-flopping antics aren’t part of SEAL training?” Danny said, in between kisses.

“Well. Not hard ones. That’ll get you court-martialed.” Steve half joked. “So what’s the lotion for?”

Steve was pretty sure her already knew.

“Just in case we need it.” Danny winked.

“Where exactly are you going with this?” Steve asked.

Danny tensed. “I’m not sure, actually.”

“What do you want?” Steve whispered, wrapping his arms around his partner.

“This is new turf for me, babe.” Danny whispered back. “I know I like having you this close—I kinda feel like I want you closer, and you’ve definitely got me turned on, that’s for sure.” He looked down, rocking his hips on top of Steve’s.

“But?” Steve asked.

Danny hesitated. “No but. I’m just not in a hurry I guess. We don’t have to do it all at once. There’ll be time later.”

Steve could barely contain his excitement.

 _Time later? This is going to last?_

“You want to be closer to me eh?” Steve mused.

Danny nodded.

Steve grabbed the lotion and spread a liberal amount on his fingers. Danny gasped as Steve slathered the cool lotion all over his dick, still rock hard and ramrod straight.

“You’re sure?” Danny looked concerned.

It was Steve’s turn to nod. He wasn’t sure he was ready, but he wanted Danny inside him. He brought his knees to his armpits, which seemed to amuse Danny, and added some lotion to himself. He wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing, and he wasn’t at all certain he would enjoy it, although he knew there must be a way to like it – otherwise gay men wouldn’t do it all the time. What’s the point of unenjoyable sex?

He knew you had to relax and breathe out. He’d had a prostate exam before. Not the most pleasant experience in the world, but not awful, and not by a naked man as hot as Danny. He felt the pressure becoming focused, and a brief moment of sharp pain as Danny entered him, which he realized was caused by him involuntarily resisting.

 _Relax McGarrett,_ he thought. _Relax or this will never work. You trust Danny—he won’t hurt you._

It was weird, but he looked up and saw the concern on Danny’s face and realized he must have looked as if he was in abject pain. He felt Danny’s pubes brush against his ass and he realized his partner was completely inside him—as much as he was going to be, at any rate.

Danny’s eyes were focused on his, searching for a reaction. He hadn’t thought Danny might need reassurance he wasn’t hurting him. He wrapped his arms around Danny’s neck.

“I’m ok.” He said.

Danny smiled and kissed him. “Excellent.”

Danny took his time, seeming concerned whenever Steve gasped or breathed too hard, but after Steve had gotten comfortable letting Danny in he began to focus on the melting sensation that was emanating from the base of his dick, which he found immensely pleasurable, and he smiled to let Danny know he was enjoying it. It seemed to spur him on, for he quickened his pace, but kept his gaze locked on Steve.

“I don’t think I can go for very long.” Danny grunted.

Steve wrapped a hand around his own dick, knowing he could go anytime he needed. And he did, in a few short, swift strokes, releasing three days worth of tension, angst and frustration in several intense spasms. He could tell Danny felt them too, for on the fourth or fifth one Danny plunged as deep as he could and gave a great gasp. Steve watched the veins on his neck tense and throb as Danny unloaded his own set of spasms (and something else warm and hot that Steve felt deep inside him). Steve had never seen another man come before, and he wondered if the look on his face matched Danny’s, which surprised him to be one almost of pain.

Danny laid his head down on Steve’s chest and let out one more involuntary spasm for good measure, breathing heavily. Steve wrapped his arms around Danny and kissed the top of his head.

“I love you, Danny.” Steve whispered.

The pause was long enough to be uncomfortable, but not fruitless.

Danny lifted his head and looked Steve directly in the eye. “I love you too.” He smiled, and said it again for good measure.

“I love you. Aloha.”


	8. Po’akolu Kakahiaka

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Always - Dennis and David Kamakahi

Having lived in Hawai’i most of his life, Steve had woken up before under the waft of a ceiling fan, with the sound of the surf and the rustling palms drifting in through the open lanai door. He’d slept in past nine before, although it hadn’t been since high school. But never before in his life had he woken up with his nose nuzzled at the base of Danny Williams’ neck, and the fingers of his left hand intertwined with those of his still-sleeping partner, who held Steve’s hand over his chest so that Steve could feel his heartbeat. This was the kind of morning unknown to Steve’s life up until then, and Steve felt it was already the best.

Three more times they’d come together the previous evening, each successive time different from the last. After their first tentative exploration a more emboldened Danny had taken charge and, for lack of a better term, rocked Steve’s world. Danny had set upon him like a starving man faced with a sumptuous buffet in a frantic tussle that left them both panting and spent. Sometime after that, Steve, still impassioned by their second tryst, had perched upon Danny’s hips and ridden him until his release was punctuated by a great growl Steve was sure to wake up anybody within three rooms of them. As Danny spooned him he thought for sure they’d finally worn themselves out, but spooning quickly turned into Danny entering him yet again, slow and sure, his armed wrapped tightly around Steve as though he might try to break free, as Danny drank him in until their exhausted, silent climaxes.

Steve suddenly felt uncomfortable that the sun had been up without him for several hours. He wasn’t accustomed to sleeping in this late, but when he tried to slip away, he woke Danny, who half consciously grunted a disagreement and pulled him back against him. Steve proffered a kiss to Danny’s jaw line from behind, just below his ear, before whispering into it, “Danny if you don’t let me up I’m gonna piss on your leg.”

Danny growled. “Charming, Steven. Begone with you.” He let go of Steve’s hand and he jumped out of bed. He really did have to go.

***

Steve hadn’t felt at all dirty until he got in the shower, when he realized his skin was caked with several layers of dried sweat and other detritus from the evening’s exertions. It felt good to let all that go, but a wave of ennui floated over him as he wondered what else might be going down the drain with it. Still floating on a high from Danny’s profession that his love was returned, he felt as though he were quickly crashing back to earth as more worries crossed his mind. He didn’t have a great deal of exposure to what it meant to be gay, but he’d never really considered, until Danny mentioned it, what loving him meant—it would certainly change the way he identified, it would change the way he was identified, it would change their interpersonal dynamic, the team dynamic—everything would change.

He was filled with self-loathing. He’d always pictured he would be better, more complete, once he’d won Danny over, but instead he felt disgusted at the obsessive, self-doubting, insecure mess he’d become in a few short hours. What was there to keep Danny from bolting, from realizing that this would all be too difficult and it would be much more simple for everybody involved if he came to his senses and tried to reconcile with Rachel, or go out and find another woman to marry, legally, free and clear, no explanation needed when they went to buy a house or adopt a child.

He felt the blood rush to his face when he realized how he’d loosed his grasp on the calm, collected, perfectly planned SEAL persona he’d been running without so much as a hair out of place for the past fifteen years.  Donuts? Pizza? Falling down steep embankments into the jungle? He was not a clumsy man, but he felt he must have looked ridiculous to Danny literally walking off a cliff because he wasn’t paying attention. That must be what it was—a pity fuck.

He let out a grunt of frustration when the soap slipped out of his hands.

 _Danny’s a sucker for a sore heart, and he just couldn’t resist after I showed him mine. This won’t last after he comes to his senses._

Steve felt like there was an elephant sitting on his chest. He felt trapped – he needed to resolve this relationship with Danny, or he’d always feel as though he was holding him back from a chance at being “normal”.  Why hadn’t he thought of this before? He had to tell Danny he wasn’t worth the trouble.

”Babe, you ok? You sound like you’re having trouble.”

Steve hadn’t seen Danny come into the bathroom, but there he was, peering through the glass shower door, still completely naked. Steve suddenly felt exposed and self conscious. He impulsively turned away from Danny, about to tell him he was fine and that Danny ought to leave him alone, when he slipped on the soap and landed hard on his ass on the tiled floor of the standup shower.

He drew up his knees and pressed his forehead into his palms. He heard the door click open as Danny was in the shower in an instant, crouching beside him.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, in his Gracie voice.

“Please leave me alone Danny.” Steve pleaded without looking up.

Danny’s voice was still soft. “No.”

Steve’s tone hushed to match. “Please.”

“Steven, look at me.” Danny was serious, but still soft. Steve looked up. He’d seen that face before. You didn’t argue with that face. Not out of fear Danny would hurt you if you didn’t, but out of fear you’d hurt Danny if you didn’t. “No more of this— no keeping things from me anymore. You were honest with me yesterday, and look where it got us. I _love_ where it got us.” Danny cupped a hand around Steve’s neck.

Steve looked back down. “I’m scared, Danny.”

“Why? What scares you babe?”

Steve felt like he might cry again. He knew it would sound even more stupid if he told Danny, but he did anyway. “You don’t have to do this just for my sake.”

“Oh boy.” Danny exhaled, shifting on his heels as the crouch became uncomfortable. “Sometimes you’re just like a woman, McGarrett.” He said, shaking his head.

Steve tensed and put his hands on the floor to get up, but Danny gently pushed him back down by his shoulders.

“Uh uh.” He said. “You’re not going to do a runner on me again. I want you to listen very carefully, because I want you to understand what I say very clearly—you wanted Danny Williams, and Danny Williams is what you got.” Danny had taken both Steve’s hands. “When I said that night at your house after the shootout that you sure knew how to pick your friends and you said you picked me—it’s my turn to pick you buddy, and you’re stuck with me. But I don’t think we had any choice in the matter, though it feels like we did. “

Danny was speaking in an unnaturally calm (for Danny) tone.

“But how do I know-“, Steve started before Danny cut him off in the same steady, calm tone.

“You want proof? I’m so glad you finally decided hard evidence is important.” Danny smiled. “I know you trust me, Steve. Have I given you any reason not to?”

Steve thought for a moment. He really hadn’t. In fact, he’d been the one hiding things from Danny. Danny’s eyes were still boring into his own. Steve knew Danny could tell he didn’t have a good rebuttal.

Steve studied the tile work again. “It would be so much easier… Why would you choose to…”

“Did you choose?” Danny asked. His calm was maddening.

“No.”

“You don’t choose who you love—but you choose how you express it, and all that expressing we’ve done should give you a good indication of my intentions.” Danny smiled again.

Steve wasn’t convinced. “That’s sex, Danny.”

Danny wasn’t fazed. “I’m glad you have such a high opinion of it.” He sighed as he rocked back on his haunches and sat opposite Steve in an awkward kitty-corner fashion, his feet pressed up against the shower all next to where Steve sat. “So fine, you’re not convinced after several hours of what was honestly some pretty fantastic sex that I love you back? I’m not going to play that way. I’ve done the ‘prove to me you love me’ thing before, and Steve, it is _exhausting_.”

Danny ran a hand through his hair, which was now thoroughly wet and all over his face.

“I’m still scared.” Steve admitted again.

Danny shook his head. “You really haven’t ever done this before, have you?” He stared at Steve, willing him to answer the question.

Steve shook his head.

Danny picked up Steve’s hand and held it in both of his. Steve hadn’t ever noticed before that Danny had a big set of paws for a man so diminutive in stature.

“I don’t know what to tell you to make you not scared, babe.” Danny admitted, with a slight shrug, “But I’ll be here, and if it helps, I’m a little scared, too.”

“Why?” Steve asked.

“Why?” Danny repeated, “Why? Let me tell you why,” Danny began. Steve had never seen him argue calmly before, tugging his hands up and down with Steve’s inside where he would normally be waving his arms about.  It was weird.

“I came to this island, for all intents and purposes, a heterosexual man on a business trip with his partner, and yes, while I fully realized that you had feelings for me, I’d never considered it beyond passing amusement, but for some reason, when you admitted it to me, it was like this great haze around you disappeared and I saw you for the first time as someone who loves me, probably more than I’ve ever been loved, ya know? And I like that. And I liked having sex with you last night, and I’m of the mind now where I’m sure I’ll like whatever else we do together, which is why I’m sitting next to you on the floor of this shower, trying to talk you down off the ‘you don’t have to do this for my sake’ crazy martyr bullshit ledge you’ve sat yourself on.”

Danny looked like he had something else to say, but he drew a deep breath and gave Steve a shrug and a look that said “That’s all I got.”

“So what’re you saying?”

Danny drew in another deep breath. Steve knew his temper was shortening.

“What I’m saying,” Danny sighed, “is that I’m here, Steve. If I didn’t think I could handle the bullshit, and believe you me, I fully understand there _will_ be a steady stream of bullshit hitting a very large fan at very high velocity for a very long time once we tell people that the concept of ‘partnership’ now has a much deeper meaning between the two of us, then I wouldn’t be handling it. But I hope this is telling, and I hope this is the ‘proof’ you’re looking for, but you’re worth it, ok? You’re worth the bullshit. I love you, and you’re worth the bullshit. Tell whoever to bring on the bullshit, because I’ve thought about it, and I’ve made my choice.” He tugged Steve’s hand to his mouth and kissed it.

Steve smiled. He felt better.

“Now that was a lot of talking. Can we go get breakfast, please?” Danny mock pleaded.

“Breakfast sounds wonderful.” Steve said.


	9. Kuka kamaʻilio

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: Guava Jelly - Ka'au Crater Boys

For a man who purported to hate the ocean as much as Danny, Steve noticed he was uncharacteristically comfortable in the water. He watched as his partner dove to a sandy spot on the rocky bottom and plucked up a sea cucumber. He splashed back to the surface with a devilish grin toward Steve.

“Hey, what do these remind you of?” He shouted.

 _Jeez, one night of man-on-man action and the man’s already cock crazy,_ Steve snickered to himself.

“Group showers in the ‘Stan after a sandstorm!” Steve shot back. “You know those things breathe through their ass.”

Even through the snorkel mask, Steve could tell Danny was making a face as he released the sea cucumber to fall back to where he had gotten it. Steve laughed at how comical Danny looked, not because of the snorkel mask, but because his great mess of hair, typically combed straight back in an immobile monument to rival a television news location reporter, was spectacularly mussed in the water.

The ocean had always calmed Steve, and he’d needed it after his breakdown in the shower. He was grateful for Danny’s solid vote of confidence – though as a career detective Steve knew it was his partner’s job to instill trust and get people to open up to him, he was amazed at how quickly Danny had soothed his fears. He felt strangely comforted yet self-conscious about how protectively affectionate he’d become of Steve as well:  having his hand on his thigh under the table throughout most of breakfast, holding the elevator door for him and pressing the small of his back to signal he should exit first—not that he minded Danno making excuses to touch him, but he felt a little odd being treated like a lady. A little odd and a little turned on.  Steve couldn’t blame him though—when you’ve dated women your whole life, do you change your habits just because you fall for a man?

Steve began to paddle back to shore. The sun was rising higher, and he wanted to get started for the North Shore before the day disappeared – they had a tendency to do that on Kaua’i. Steve was convinced the days were even shorter on Kaua’i than they were on O’ahu—he’d always thought that whenever he visited.  With Danno on Kaua’i he felt the week was already flying by, even faster now that it had gone better than he’d dreamed.

Steve sat with the waves lapping into his lap on the rocky shore that surrounded the protective cove just a short walk up Lawai Beach Rd from the hotel.  He watched Danny snorkel his way back toward shore, to shallow enough water where swimming became uncomfortable, and stand up into an awkward stance before staggering the rest of the way toward him. Steve smiled, remembering he’d finally gotten Danny into a pair of board shorts instead of the cut offs he favored, and eyed his body again; he wondered how the man kept it so sculpted on a diet of junk food and coffee.

“Danny, take the fins off or you’ll fall.” Steve laughed.

“They’re the only thing protecting my feet!” Danny protested, before he awkwardly flopped into Steve’s lap.

“Oof!” Steve gasped. “Easy killer.”

Danny ignored his complaint and set to work removing his fins. Steve hugged him close and proffered a kiss on his cheek.

“Hey Danno, look!” Steve pointed out across the water at the turtle poking its head above the water in between swells. “Honu.”

“I know.” Danny said. “I saw her when I was out there. Or her brother. I saw one.”

Steve nuzzled the back of Danny’s neck. “They symbolized longevity to the Ancient Hawaiians.”

Danny grunted as he took off the other flipper. “I need all the longevity I can get, working with your crazy ninja ass.”

Steve rested his chin on Danny’s shoulder. “Speaking of work. . . “

“I know what you’re thinking Steve, and it’s going to be ok, I think. You still have full immunity and means, right? It’s not like we’re your workaday State Government department.”

“They still have their rules, Danno. You know you’re always telling me we might have immunity and means but the perps still have to be tried in the same court as everybody else, and we still have to follow _their_ rules.”

Danny twisted around in Steve’s lap to look him in the eye. “You’re not talking me out of this.”

“I’m not trying to talk you out of this. It’s just—something that needs considering is all.”

Danny kissed Steve, tasting like the ocean. “We’ll hash it out when we get back to O’ahu. For now, the point of this whole excursion was immersion, right?” Danny grinned. “So, immerse me.”

“Oh I’ll immerse you all right, Danny. I’ll immerse you ‘til you can’t see straight.” He playfully splashed a handful of seawater into Danny’s lap.

Danny chuckled. “I think ‘straight’ went out the window a while ago, don’t you?”

He wriggled out of Steve’s embrace and stumbled to his feet. “Come on. We’re wasting daylight.”

Steve put his hands behind him to stand up when Danny offered him a hand. He didn’t need it, but his dick twitched again at the chivalry. Danny pulled him up with a little bit too much gusto, so that he began to fall backwards when Steve reached his feet, but Steve’s reflexes were still quick, and he caught his partner before he lost his balance on the rocks.

“Whoops, I gotcha!” Steve laughed.

Danny pierced his gaze with those impossibly blue eyes again. “You sure do.”

***

The view over Hanalei Bay was incomparable, even with sheets of rain threatening to cloud the view. Steve and Danny had been in the middle of a surfing lesson that Danny was doing pretty well on, and they’d kept going when the first few droplets began to make flower petals in the ocean, but when the wall of water hit, they’d run for the cover of the Lobby Bar at the St. Regis Princeville.

“This is my turf, Steven.” Danny had proclaimed. “The original St. Regis is in New York City, and it is tradition to have a Bloody Mary.” The server, overhearing him, nodded and scurried away to put in the order.

“Interesting. Bloody Mary.” Steve smiled. “You know that was a character in _South Pacific_ , which was filmed on this very spot.”

“No shit?” Danny brightened, looking out the window. “Yeah, I can kind of see it now. That’s one of Ma’s favorites. She loves Mitzi Gaynor.”

Steve studied him for a moment. “And one of yours, too, I imagine?”

Danny turned pink. “I might have enjoyed a musical or two in my time.”

“The masculine ones, like _Grease_ , and _Guys & Dolls_, and _Oklahoma_ , right?” Steve said facetiously.

“Right, I mean—hey, are you making fun of me?” Danny caught the mocking smile spreading across Steve’s lips. “You’re clearly the expert on _South Pacific_ , Mr. Hypocrite.”

“Mom was an extra in the movie.”

“Wow, that’s pretty cool actually. Which scene?”

“The beach scene. When Billis and Lieutenant Cable arrive on Bali Hai for the first time. They filmed that on Tunnels Beach, just on the other side of the bay there.”

“Oh yeah!” Danny’s eyes flashed in recollection. “To think I saw your Mom on TV, and now we’re—“

Steve studied Danny as he trailed off. “We’re?”

Danny smiled shyly. “We’re—we. Us.”

Steve smiled broader and focused on Danny’s left hand, draped over the high sides of the club chair he had sunk deep into. He gingerly held his fingers in the palm of his own hand, smoothing Danny’s ring finger with the pad of his thumb, thinking how much he would’ve liked to eventually slip a ring on that finger.

 _Moving too fast, McGarrett. Put the brakes on before you freak him out._

The drinks arrived, breaking his thoughts.

This definitely was a fancy place. The beverages were dressed up like a Brazilian samba singer.

Steve took a sip. “OK Danno, I gotta admit, this is pretty good, even though I’m not a fan of tomato juice.”

Danny took a long sip and set his drink back down with a refreshed gasp. “Would I ever steer you wrong, partner?”

Steve reflected for a moment. “Do you really want me to answer that?”

Danny braced, defensively, and Steve immediately softened. “No,” he smiled, his voice softer. “I don’t think you would.”

“Want you to answer that, or steer you wrong?”

Steve smirked. “The latter.”

“Ooh, la-di-dah, _the latter.”_ Danny mocked.

Steve let it go. Danny looked so damn cute when he was giving Steve shit. He took a sip of his Bloody Mary and studied the swells coming in over the bay.

“You haven’t bitched about Hawai’i as much since we got here.” Steve mused.

Danny was calculating what to say. “Well. . .” He paused to take a sip. Steve chuckled as he fussed with the garnishes on top of the glass, which fell in his face as he sipped.

“This isn’t O’ahu.” Danny continued. “But I guess I don’t dislike O’ahu that much either. I was just uprooted. I was comfortable where I was. I’m not like you, Steve, I haven’t traveled that much. I like knowing what I know and knowing what’s where and what it’s like. I like _familiarity._ ”

Steve opened his mouth to speak, but Danny cut him off.

“Familiarity, family, you know. That’s been Gracie so far. It’s not a lot of family, even for a small island in the middle of the Pacific. But it’s growing. It’s Chin. It’s Kono. It’s Jenna. But you, it’s a lot of you. _Ohana_ , like you say.”

Danny was out of his chair and behind Steve’s in a flash. He slid his hands down Steve’s arms and cupped the tops of Steve’s knuckles in his hands and nestled his chin on Steve’s shoulder, so they were cheek to cheek.

“I look at you and I see _Ohana._ Almost as much as I do Gracie. I’m sure I have a lot longer than I’ve cared to admit it. I see a lot of you in this island, Steve—its quiet beauty, its unpredictable weather.” He chuckled to himself. “And if it starts to feel like home I’m beginning to suspect it’s because you’re here.”

Steve was lulled into silence by Danny’s soliloquy. Danny was actually _rocking_ him from side to side.

“Come on McGarrett.” He said, after a while, standing up. “There’s gotta be some overpriced dinner joint in this delicate flower of a hotel.”

“There is, but it may be too rich for our budget.” Steve managed, remembering himself.

Danny shrugged. “I paid last night. We’ll call it two dinners worth.”

Steve returned the shrug. “Works for me. Let’s go.”

“Am I dressed ok?” Danny asked as they walked away.

“Danno, it may be five star, but it’s still Hawai’i. If you’ve got a shirt and slippers, you’re good.”

“Sounds good, babe. Just hope I can get a good steak.”

The clouds had broken and the sun was beginning to set over the beach that had once stood in for Bali Hai as Steve took Danny’s hand and they hunted out the [Kaua’i Grill](http://www.starwoodhotels.com/stregis/property/dining/attraction_detail.html?propertyID=189&attractionId=15912).

***

Dinner took hours as Steve and Danny lingered over their plates, enjoying each other’s company in the leisurely style of the truly relaxed. They stayed long after dessert, and even after a cup of coffee Steve noticed Danny’s eyelids were getting heavy. After a leisurely stroll into the warm night, from which the clouds had vanished, leaving the asphalt glistening with the leavings of the afternoon shower, Danny’s soft snores emanated from the passenger seat even before they left Princeville.

Full days with the Kaua’i at your feet were exhausting, Steve observed, and he was glad Danny had been sleeping so well during the trip; he’d been complaining he hadn’t been sleeping well lately. He enjoyed night drives on the island. He felt all the islands had a unique spirit, and it was more pronounced at night.  And night on Kaua’i was _night_. Not like the bright lights of Honolulu which were always on, the frequent buzz of jetliners departing on their redeye sojourns back to the Mainland; Kaua’i was almost paralyzed by the night, so still it sometimes felt as though the earth had stopped spinning.

Danny was still asleep when they reached the hotel, and nudges from Steve after he turned off the car were doing little to rouse him. Steve opened the passenger door and undid his partner’s seatbelt.

“Come on, Danno, we’re home.” He said, tugging at his arm.

Danny recoiled, sleepily grunting disagreement.

“Come on, you’re not sleeping in the car.” Danny was going limp again.

“Forced my hand then. Put your arms around my neck.”

It was more difficult than Steve had imagined it would be to pluck Danny out of the low seats of the Mustang—the man was little, but _solid._ But Steve was a strong man—he could handle it. He was surprised Danny had submitted to it; he wasn’t sure if it was laziness, trust, or fatigue, but he certainly enjoyed the tender moment.

Danny jolted awake when Steve dropped his feet to the floor in front of the room door. Steve managed to get him into the room, undressed, and tucked into bed, when he heard his soft snoring again before he had his own clothes off. As soon as he’d snuggled into a cozy spoon with Danny, his head hit the pillow and he joined his partner in dreamland.


	10. Aumoe Aloha

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: White Sandy Beach - Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole

Steve awoke to the sound of his phone chirping and he noticed the lights were on and Danny wasn’t in bed with him anymore as he sat up to answer it.

“Alooooha boss-man!” It was Kono.

“Hi Kono.” Steve said, rubbing his eyes. “Do you know what time it is?”

“Ah, shit, sorry, brah. Didn’t mean to wake you boys.” She apologized.

“How much have you had to drink?” Steve smiled. Kono wasn’t a drinker.

“Chin Ho, Jenna, Kamekona.” Kono slurred. “Teaching me how to play ‘Asshole’. I’m the asshole.” She giggled.

“Yes,” Steve agreed. “Yes you are. Why are you calling?” He heard discussion and rustling in the background.

“Steve? It’s Jenna.”

“Hi Jenna. And how much have you had to drink?”

“Nothing.” She giggled. Steve heard Chin Ho slur “She’s lying!” in the background. “So did ya boff Danny yet?”

Chaos ensued on the other end of the line as there was a clear battle for whoever could grab the phone. He heard Jenna squealing and numbers dialing as it sounded like she kept a death grip on the phone, carrying on about how it was her turn to talk to Steve.

“She doesn’t mean that, boss.” It was Chin’s turn.

“You’re full of shit. How much money’s on the table?”

Chin paused. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“The game’s up, Chin. Danny told me everything before he kissed m-“

 _Shit._

Chin let out an awfully gloating noise. “You owe me fifty bucks Cuz!”

“I’m hanging up now!” Steve laughed.

“Who was on the phone?” Steve looked up and saw Danny. He hadn’t heard him come back into the room, but his jaw dropped when he saw him.

His partner carried a laundry bag almost filled with plumeria, and he had a [double plumeria lei](http://www.cindysleishoppe.com/home/cls/page_82_28/double_yellow_plumeria.html) around his neck, and another blossom over his ear.

“The rest of our team, drunk and settling bets on whether we fucked.” Steve smiled. “And they’re teaching Kono how to play ‘Asshole’”.

“Lemme guess, she’s the asshole.” Danny smirked.

“Is she ever.” Steve laughed.  “Where did you get all these flowers at 11:30 at night?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” Danny said, shedding the plumeria lei, stripping off his shirt, and replacing the lei. His shorts followed. “So I went out to pick some of these flowers you like so much, and Noelani at the front desk noticed that I’d walked back through with a bag full of them, and she gave me this.” Danny indicated the plumeria lei he was wearing. “And this.” he pulled a white coil out of the bag, and slipped in bed behind Steve, who was still sitting up.

Steve could smell what it was even before Danny uncoiled it and slipped it around his neck from behind, the [delicate buds](http://www.cindysleishoppe.com/home/cls/page_61_8/micronesian_ginger_white_lei.html) still cool from the refrigerator they’d undoubtedly been kept in. “White ginger.” Steve almost whispered.

“Yes, white ginger.” Danny said. “Noelani asked me if I was picking flowers for anybody special, and I said, as a matter of fact I was, and she gave me these that were for some VIPs who cancelled, and they were going to waste anyway.”

“Danny.” Steve was still whispering. “White ginger is typically a wedding lei.”

Danny nuzzled the back of Steve’s neck with butterfly kisses. “She mentioned.”

Steve shivered. “You mean-“

Danny shushed him softly. “This isn’t a proposal, Steven. Sometimes a lei is just a lei.”

He was right. You didn’t really need an excuse to give lei, Steve thought.

“But don’t rule it out.”

 _Shit._

“Danny, this is spectacular.”

Danny shushed him again. “Just let me work on you a little bit.” He said, beginning to massage Steve’s shoulders, tracing up his neck and spidering his hands through his scalp. He reached into the bag and tucked a plumeria behind Steve’s ear and continued his massage.

He was intoxicated by the near overwhelming fragrance of the white ginger, and at length, after Danny’s massage had morphed into a rocking embrace, he melted back into his partner’s arms and closed his eyes, dozing for a split second before he felt Danny slip out from behind him, laying him back down on the stack of pillows. Steve watched his cute butt twitch as he walked on his knees to his side of the oversized bed before kneeling beside him. Steve giggled.

“What?” Danny asked, smiling, as he grabbed the bag of plumeria.

“Never thought I’d see you wearing nothing but flowers.”

Danny blushed. Actually blushed, like he realized for the first time it might have been out of character for him. “New things, Steven.” He grinned broadly. “New things.”

“You have a cute nose.” Steve said.

Steve stared for a moment at Danny’s soft dick, still quite impressive, plumping slightly as it brushed against the sheets he was sitting on.

Danny plucked a plumeria from the bag and held it under Steve’s nose, giving him the briefest whiff of the light, delicate fragrance before tracing it down his jaw. Steve shivered as it brushed the side of his neck as Danny swirled it around his Adam’s apple and let it rest in the notch between his collar bones, like an heirloom brooch on a Victorian choker, punctuating the two ridges like a Morse code dot in between two dashes.

Danny continued with more flowers until he had formed an unbroken chain down the middle of Steve’s chest with the bright white blossoms, covering each nipple, intermittently leaning forward and kissing his lips softly before continuing the plumeria procession down his front, briefly holding each of the delicate flowers under Steve’s nose before tracing it down the same path to meet its new neighbor on a smooth canvas sparsely tufted with hair and tattoos.

When he reached the bottom of Steve’s rib cage, Steve hadn’t realized he was holding his breath, and he took several in rapid succession as Danny marched his floral parade onto the softer, yet still taut skin of his abdomen, threatening to derail the entire chain. He kept his movement to a minimum, feeling eroticized by the self-discipline required to keep absolutely still while his partner worked to adorn him with his favorite flower. He felt less naked with each added blossom covered him, yet more vulnerable as the delicate petals could easily be crushed and browned with a wrong move. Along the way, Danny discovered spots that made Steve shudder; such as when slipped the stem into his belly button, or when he ticketed the ridges of his hip bones before placing the flower.

Steve’s eyes wandered to a smaller pile of flowers next to Danny’s knee. He’d been pulling smaller blossoms from the bag and saving them. Steve wondered why in silence until the chain of flowers reached all the way to his crotch and his thick nest of dark pubic hair began to disappear into a white puddle of flowers, until Danny’s supply was exhausted, and he sat back to admire his work.

“Baby.” Steve whispered. “Kiss me.”

Danny obliged. He was remarkably silent. He lingered for a moment on Steve’s lips and then set to work, removing the flowers with his lips, careful not to bite down too hard lest he crush them. Once he’d plucked the last flower from between Steve’s legs he set to work on more traditional, direct activities that soon left the two men collapsed upon each other in an impassioned, exhausted flush.

“Danny?” Steve asked the top of his partners head.

“Mmm?” Danny responded.

“That was the most erotic moment of my life.” Steve said as Danny lifted his head to look into his eyes. “Mahalo.”

“It was pretty hot. You’re pretty hot.” Danny smiled, dumbly.

Steve gave a tired, intoxicated smile and brushed the stray hair out of Danny’s face.

“I could do that forever.” Steve ventured, thinking it might have been a mistake as soon as he said it.

Danny didn’t seem bothered. “Maybe you will.”


	11. Ke Ninau

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suggested track: In This Life - Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole

Steve stared out the window into lush garden behind the shop. He’d read a placard describing the history of the old building that now sold local arts and crafts, and he felt the loneliness of the place invade his sensibility. The shop had been built in the late 19th Century by a Japanese immigrant who opened a tailor shop, and worked there for a half century after his wife died. Steve pondered that although the world seemed to come to Hawai’i in modern times, before travel was made so easy it must have been a lonely place indeed.

He reflected on how it was almost impossible to feel lonely on O’ahu. Not only because there were over a million people living there, but also because of the closeness of his _ohana¸_ and now his closeness with Danny. He thought about how it was ironic that Danny should fall in love with him on an island that is among the best for those seeking escape and solitude.

His ruminations were soon broken by the keeper of his affections. Danny looked perplexed, with a trinket in each hand.

“Would Gracie like this hot pink candle in a coconut shell or this carving of a kitty?”

Steve saw that the shop was empty, and the shopkeeper distracted, before catching Danny off guard and pulling him into his arms. “I love you, Danno.”

Danny squeezed his arms quickly around Steve before wriggling from his grasp. “I love you too, you handsy oaf. Now help me decide.” He motioned with the two objects like they were on a balance scale.

“Both.” Steve said.

“Both?” Danny asked, incredulously. “You want me to spoil that girl?”

“One from you, one from me.” Steve said. “Can’t let you spoil her all by yourself.”

Danny smiled in defeat. “All right babe. I’ll go have these wrapped.”

Steve smiled. He knew Danny would have gotten them both anyway.

***

The sun hung low in the sky as Steve jolted awake to Danny’s hand on his shoulder. He was sprawled in a chaise on the lanai of their suite.  Danny was perched at his side, facing him on the chaise, a smile spreading across his face and his hand drawing down Steve’s arm. His hair glinted in the sunlight, seeming even more gold when backlit by the golden sky of the late afternoon sun.

“Hey you. You were out for almost four hours.”

Steve twisted and popped the joints in his back. “I guess paddle boarding the Wailua River this morning was more exhausting than I thought it would be.”

Danny stifled a laugh. “In the entire time I have known you, I have never once known you to take a _nap._ ”

Steve shrugged. “You look so sexy in that shirt. So what will we do on our last night on Kaua’i?”

A wave of self-consciousness swept over Danny’s face as he looked down at the purple aloha shirt adorned with large white hibiscus. “I made reservations at[ Roy’s](http://www.royshawaii.com/poipu.html). I cannot believe that you talked me into this, and two others at [Hilo Hattie](http://www.hilohattie.com/).”

“I’m surprised you could be talked into it.” Steve muttered.

“I think you’ll find you can talk me into a lot of things.” Danny leaned in and kissed him. “All I need is the right motivation.”

“Oh yeah?” Steve grinned, lifting Danny onto his lap. “What else motivates you?”

Danny tousled Steve’s hair. “You’ll have to find that out for yourself. Come on,” he said, getting up.”Take a shower, you still smell like the river. I’ll take your lei out of the fridge if you want to wear it tonight.” Danny breezed back into the room while Steve grunted out of his chair.

Danny was fixing his hair at the mirror and he swatted Steve on the butt as he slipped past him toward the bathroom. Steve was convinced this would be a most enjoyable evening. While he almost never had dessert, he was looking forward to indulging in a chocolate soufflé.

***

The meal was excellent. Steve had misoyaki glazed butterfish and Danny even tried some, proclaiming it the best fish he’d ever eaten. He’d told Danny when ordering he’d have to order his own chocolate soufflé if he wanted one, because he couldn’t be sure what he’d do if he saw an extra spoon coming at his precious dessert from across the table, even if it was his partner’s.

They’d made a lot of progress on the mechanics of returning to O’ahu as a couple as well. They discussed boundaries and work rules and loads of other mundane items that Danny brought up, out of years of experience working in law enforcement that Steve hadn’t even considered. Danny proved to be a genius at the inner workings of the legal system from an enforcer’s point of view, and Steve was thankful that he had someone with working knowledge on his side.

“The most important thing,” Danny pointed out between bites of soufflé, “is that you can’t protect me, Steve. You can’t tell me an assignment is too dangerous when you wouldn’t have before because you weren’t in love with me then. You can’t shield me from harm, because I’d lose my effectiveness as a cop.”

“Danny, if I was going to do that, I’d have been doing it. I’ve loved you from the beginning.”

Danny beamed and raised both his hands as though he were to pat Steve’s cheeks across the table. “Look at this guy! What a line!”

They left the restaurant with their arms around each other’s waists.

***

They spend no small amount of time getting back to their room. Steve had a comfortable buzz, and he knew Danny had drunk even more. He felt a semi erection creeping up behind him as Danny wrapped his arms around him while he fiddled open the door of their suite.

“What’s that I feel, babe?” he smirked.

“It’s only because I have to piss like a racehorse.” Danny squirmed past him as he opened the door but Steve wrapped his arms back around his partner as they staggered toward the bed and flopped onto it, knocking Danny’s duffle bag, which he’d begun packing before they left for dinner, onto the floor.

“Gotta pee, do ya, partner?” Steve laughed, as he pinned Danny to the bed. “How about I tickle it out of ya?”

“Stop, stop!” Danny squealed. “You’ll be sleeping in a wet bed if you keep it up! Stop!” He wriggled away from Steve for the second time and darted toward the bathroom.

Steve laughed at himself and slumped back on the bed for a moment while he heard a groan of relief Danny, and a steady stream tickling the porcelain from the bathroom. After a moment he rolled off the bed and picked up Danny’s duffle bag from the floor, noticing two blue boxes from Na Hoku had fallen out. Danny must have picked them up while he was napping.

He opened the first box and couldn’t help but smile his broadest smile when he saw the [koa wood slipper pendant](http://www.nahoku.com/collections/hawaiian-slipper-collection/sterling-silver-slipper-pendant-with-koa-wood-inlay.html) that was similar to the one he had noticed in the window on their first morning on Kaua’i. He knew Gracie would love it, and Danny’s thoughtfulness warmed his insides. Danny sure was taking a long piss, but Steve quickly opened the second box, and nearly pissed himself right there. He was still staring at the three diamonds on the [white gold engagement ring](http://www.nahoku.com/jewelry-type/rings/white-gold-wedding-ring-with-diamond-33983.html) when Danny came out of the bathroom having already shed his shirt and pants. “Oh, shit.” He said, his jaw dropping.

“Oh shit’s right.” Steve said, looking up. He was furious. Danny’s intentions had been made painfully clear, for it was not a man’s ring he was staring at in the box. He tried to focus on Danny but the tears he hadn’t noticed were welling up in his eyes had streaked down his cheeks, but not before more followed and blurred his vision.

“Steve, listen, it’s not what you-“ Danny started.

“You don’t get to say anything!” Steve exploded.

He stood there for a second, fuming, before Danny started again. “You don’t understand…”

“No, I understand.” Steve thundered, his face ashen. “Give Rachel my congratulations.”

He wiped his eyes so he could see a clear path away from Danny, and he bolted for the door, vaguely hearing a desperate plea for him to stay so Danny could explain himself.

***

Steve ran until he realized he was hyper dehydrated from the alcohol. Thankfully he found himself in front of Sueoka Market in Old Koloa Town. The running hadn’t cleared his head, but it had kept thoughts out of it. He didn’t want to consider Danny’s betrayal, or the fact that he’d obviously just been used for sex – not even sex! What was his game, Steve wondered. If it was just sex, then why all the “I love you” shit on top of it? He felt foolish. Foolish to have entrusted his heart to a man who was clearly not over his ex-wife; foolish to think that any negative outcome wouldn’t affect their working relationship.  He bought two large bottles of water, downed one, and clutched the other in his hand as he picked up speed toward the church.

He hopped over the low lava rock wall, and proceeded to the headstone he hadn’t seen in nineteen years.

“Aloha, Mom.” He sat down on the grass.

“I screwed up big time you know. I fell in love with a man who’s not in love with me, but for some reason he likes to act like it. Oh, by the way, I love men sometimes. Maybe all the time, actually. I’m not sure about that yet. I don’t just _love_ people, you know. I bet you know, actually. Bet you knew I mean. They say parents always know, even if you don’t tell them. I bet Dad knew too."

“How did you do it with Dad?” he asked. “I know he must not have been that easy, but you stuck it out for all those years.”

Steve thought about how the headstone was mostly just a marker. There hadn’t been much left to bury, but she’d specified she wanted to be lain to rest on Kaua’i. She was his connection to this land, and he felt almost as though the earth ran in his veins, which is why he’d been so keen to bring Danny here. But that was all over now. Danny was clearly just sporting before taking the plunge, again, with the same woman.

“I love him. He doesn’t love me.” Steve tried it on for size. “I love him. He doesn’t love me.” He came to a realization and sighed. “I love him.”

_Even with this damn mess, I still love that asshole. Even if he ends up married to someone else, I’ll still love him. Damn it, this isn’t how this was supposed to be._

He sat staring at the headstone for a long time, and then got up and turned to leave. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a familiar looking blue Mustang lumbering up Poipu Rd. He ducked behind the lava wall, even though the row of trees in front of the church gave some pretty adequate cover, although he was sure Danny was scanning the countryside for him and not running to the store for the munchies. It touched him that Danny was out looking for him, but it also infuriated him, because he knew Danny wasn’t sober.

_Whatever. Danny’s a grownup. He’s not going to get a DUI for driving the speed limit in Koloa at midnight on a Thursday night._

Steve hopped the lava rock wall again and ran on toward the Pacific.

***

Steve wandered for hours, without any specific aim. Unable to face Danny yet, he stayed away from the roads because he was almost sure Danny wouldn’t stop looking until he found him, which confused him. The game was up. What else did he have to explain?

He wandered all the way down to Spouting Horn and back to the rocky beach where he and Danny had spend the previous morning snorkeling.  He sat on the rocks, where he’d cuddled with Danny nearly 48 hours previous, wondering if he’d ever do it again. He stared out over the waves, which were becoming harder to discern now that the moon had set. He liked to think that whenever he was here on Kaua’i, by himself on a stretch of rocky shore that the waves that came in while he was here belonged to him. The waves never turned off when he left – they would keep crashing on shore until the end of days, but the brief periods that he was here—those waves would be his forever.

He knew it was foolish, but he was trained in night swimming, and he had the sudden urge to go into the water. The alcohol had worked through his system and he had a bit of a headache, and felt the water would help. He rose and pulled his shirt over his head. He almost stumbled getting his cargo pants and underwear over his slippers, but he knew he had to keep those on if he was going to be stepping into water he couldn’t see the bottom of. He knew he could get arrested for skinny dipping, it was illegal throughout the state, but again, in Poipu in the hours just before dawn he wasn’t terribly worried. He tossed his clothes onto a bush separating the rocky beach from Lawai Beach Rd and waded into the surf.

The surf was gentle yet, he felt a tug of the undertow. The moon was still full, and although it had set it undoubtedly continued to have some effect on the tides. Lights were beginning to blink on at the adjacent condo complex, and the first hints of graying light were finding their way across the Eastern horizon.

He felt defeated, not even wanting to swim, but the water felt good on his body, which ached slightly from the last several hours of cross-country hiking. He floated out across the swells, not quite caring if he floated out to sea.

He was in the middle of the small cove when he vaguely heard the thud of a car door slamming. He sat up and let his legs float down beneath him and he saw Danny stumble through the bushes and down to where the waves were breaking on the shore.

“Steve!” He shouted. “Get back in here before you get arrested for public indecency!”

“No!” he shouted back. “Go away Danno!”

“No!” Danny shouted back.  Steve could tell he was grumbling to himself, and panic rose in his chest when he realized Danny was taking off his own clothes.

“Dammit Danny.” He said to himself. “Stop!” He barked. “Danny! It’s not safe! Stay there.”

“Fuck you, McGarrett. I’m coming after you!” Danny shouted back.

Steve began to sprint back to shore, but he was weighted down by his hiking slippers. All he needed was for Danny to step on a sea urchin in the dark and he’d never forgive himself. The panic continued as he watched Danny pad into the water, jerking up a foot having stepped on something sharp, but he continued into the water, and Steve knew he’d have to stop the progression himself.

Danny was in water up to his nipples by the time Steve got to him, and he immediately pulled him to his chest with his arms tight around him. “Pick your feet up!” he ordered, beginning in a shout, but remembering he didn’t need to anymore, ending softly.

“Why?” Danny was confused.

“Danny, this bottom is covered in sea urchins and God knows what else you shouldn’t be stepping on. That’s why I told you to stay on shore.”

“Oh.” Danny said softly. “I thought you just didn’t want to-“

“I don’t.” Steve said.

He looked into Danny’s eyes, which drooped in hurt. He was still furious at his partner, but that did nothing to quell his urge to kiss him. But he wasn’t going to get off that easy.

“I don’t want to hear about how you’re going to marry someone else.” Steve finished, the words burning in his throat.

“Look at this, Steven.” Danny unwrapped his left arm from around Steve and held his hand in front of his face. The engagement ring glinted from where it was loose around his thumb.

“What makes you think I want to look at that?” Steve huffed, averting his eyes.

Danny’s eyes brightened. “I don’t think you looked close enough, Steven.” He smiled.

Steve didn’t look at the ring, but into Danny’s eyes. “What do you mean? That’s a woman’s ring.”

“Like I know how to buy an engagement ring for a man!” Danny protested. “Look at it, Steve. Where’s Rachel going to wear this, around her neck? Look at how big it is.”

Steve looked again. It was on Danny’s _thumb_ , and it was too big even for it.

Danny was barely audible. “It’s for you, baby. For _you._ ”

Steve searched Danny’s face, but the only thing he could see in the man’s eyes was steely resolve, and a silly smile on his face.

“What?” It was all he could manage.

Danny rolled his eyes. “I’d get down on one knee, but I’d drown. Give me your hand.”

Steve complied, feeling Danny’s weight settle onto his legs, which he’d wrapped around Steve’s waist. Danny slipped the ring on Steve’s finger. A fraction tight, but otherwise a good fit. Steve knew little about gemstones, but he reckoned he was wearing about a carat. He didn’t even want to think about how much this would have cost Danny.

“Steve?” Danny whispered.

Steve looked up at Danny.

Danny seemed at a loss for words. “Marry me? I don’t care if it’s not legal, just-“

Steve interrupted him with a kiss. When he broke away, Danny didn’t miss a beat. “Is that a ‘yes’?”

“Yes.” Steve smiled. “Absolutely yes.” He kissed Danny again.

Danny chuckled. “This wasn’t quite how I pictured this happening.”

Steve looked at Danny inquisitively as he began to wade back toward shore with Danny in his arms, while the first rays of sunlight began to illuminate the waves.

“Well, I sort of figured we’d have clothes on.” Danny shook his head.

“Well, I suppose it’s the end, not the means, right Danno?” Steve joked.

“Could I have expected anything different from you, Super SEAL?”

Steve shook his head.

“But you have to promise me one thing, Steven.” Danny said as Steve set him down on dry land.

“What’s that?” Steve asked.

“No more jumping to the worst conclusion and running off again, ok? You’ve done it twice to me now. That doesn’t mean I’m not going to chase after you every time, but I’m getting old – give a guy a break!”

Steve laughed. “I’ll do my best, Danno.”

***

Auntie K. was waiting for them in the jet bridge with a pair of plumeria lei when they disembarked at Honolulu International late Friday night.

“Ho'omaika'i 'ana!” she exclaimed, proffering each of them with a lei, a hug, and a kiss on both cheeks.

“Oh, you heard, eh?”

Auntie K. smiled. “You have quite the fan club waiting for you outside security.”

Steve and Danny exchanged glances.

“E hele kakou!” Auntie said. “We’re holding up traffic!”

They chatted with Auntie a bit about their time on Kaua’i as she escorted them down to baggage claim. Steve held Danny’s hand tightly; the new diamonds on his finger making him feel unnecessarily flashy. The terminal was nearly empty as their flight was one of the last arrivals of the evening, but there was a definite crowd waiting for them at the foot of the escalator down to baggage claim. Jenna, Kono, Chin, Kamekona, the Governor, and several other mutual friends from HPD and the State Government, and even some of Auntie’s coworkers from Hawaiian Airlines who knew Steve were waiting for them, each wearing with a lei and carrying two more.

Steve picked out Kono from the crowd, because she was the first one to spot them, and she squealed, releasing the floodgates of Alohas and hugs and congratulations. Steve managed to slip the bag containing the Bubba Burger to Kono before being covered in flowers.

Steve looked down at Danny, whose face he could barely see over the stack of lei around his neck.

“Does it feel like home now, Danny?” Steve smiled.

“Because you’re here.” Danny shot back. “Forever. Kau a kau.”


End file.
